On Christmas Day, I thought it would be cool for Daddy and Wyatt to take a four-hour train ride on Amtrak since Wyatt loves trains.  I would drive in the car, through the torrential rains and pick them up on the way to our destination.  Everything seemed to be going great.  I was able to stop off at a beach near Santa Barbara and walk the dog just as the rains let up.  It was beautiful.

Well, the train broke down about 30 minutes south of the station.  Wyatt had a screaming meltdown for about three hours while Amtrak sorted it all out.  At least everyone on the train was really nice about it.  He had a very hoarse throat later that night.

To make matters worse, after I got to the station my car wouldn't start up again.  Not used to driving in the rain, I had left the headlights on, I think.  So there it was, Christmas Day, with hardly a soul in sight and most places closed for business.  I tried to get a cab driver to give me a jump start but he only succeeded in sucking the remaining electricity from the car's battery.  He did, however, give me the toll free number to the Auto Club.  Even though I don't have AAA these days, they were wonderful about connecting me, free of charge, to a local tow company.  $45 and 30 minutes later, I was back behind the wheel!  

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Good Afternoon my world wide web friends!

I recently came across this song... Beatiful U R by Deborah Cox! You have to go to Youtube and hear this song and it's lyrics. I have offically designated this my song of 2009! Check it out!

Hello Fellow Parents-  I hope everyone had a great holiday and is excited about 2009!

As the mother of 3, including 2 with developmental disabilities (autism/aspergers), I opened Autism Connection in 2004 to help families like mine. 

I have almost 700 members with children who have been diagnosed within the past 2 years - that is astounding and, due to the volume of inquiries, I'm looking to hire paid parent contributors willing to share ideas, tips, advice, resources or answer questions that are specifically emailed.  There are more members then those of recently diagnosed children, so topics are literally countless. Input from you will be written- no phone calls/skype or alike needed.

Some of the details:

Must have a personality.  Not looking for clinical jargon, research reviews, etc.  Looking for a wide range of personalities to make information as diverse as possible.

Must speak English or Spanish as a native language.

Must meet deadlines.

You'll set your schedule.

You'll choose amount of time you work.

You choose your payday.

You'll have a blast!

You'll need a paypayl account to get paid (if impossible, we can discuss alternate methods of payment).  read more »

Wyatt has been going pee in the potty (toilet) all by himself, but only if he is allowed to run around the house nude.  Sometimes he will go if he is wearing a shirt and nothing else.  The other day he went on command ("Go pee in the potty!") and then later he actually flushed afterwards without being prompted.

Previously, he was peeing in the trash, the dog water bowl, and the plastic children's pool on our patio.  He still pees in that last one but not so much as before. 

Firstly, I want to say THANK YOU so much to the people who replied to my last post. I wasn’t expecting to have such wonderful responses with caring and wise words of concern and help.  I was also really surprised by how easily everyone read between the lines. I have been telling my friends and family what I wrote for a year and no one really got it. It seems like I have found a group of people that know exactly what I’m talking about. I have never been depressed like this before.My marriage is on the rocks.My girlfriends can’t relate with me anymore. They don’t understand why I cancel on them so much. They don’t understand that I just can’t muster up the mojo to go out.All I want to do is go to sleep…my classic way of not dealing with or feeling anything. I have talked to my doctor and was on anti-depressants for a few months in the summer. For me, all the drug did was seem to turn off my emotions, and I didn’t like it. My husband and I would fight and I would need to have a good cry but no tears would show up.  read more »

Worrying is second nature for me. It just comes natural. I can even worry about things that haven’t happened or don’t exist. Our journey over the past year sent me into a total worrying tailspin. The following are things I worry over:

1)      Liam- Are people understanding what he wants and needs? Am I doing the right thing? Should I be working with him harder? Is my job taking too much out of me to give him the maximum? Is his diet OK? Will I ever here my son talk or tell me his opinion? Will I be changing his diapers when he’s 7? What does his future hold? The questions are endless, seriously.

2)      Appointments- Oh my god…. appointments out the wazoo. Single-handedly, like most of you, I track all appointments. I get us to appointments ON TIME. I attend every single one. I get Liam to daycare and then zip downtown to get to work.  read more »

I'm betting that just about all of you know that APRIL is Autism Awareness Month.  Am I right??  We here in NJ use this month to educate and support.  I have read several other blogs concerning how frustrating it can be to staff and parents both when they come up against people in their community who know little or nothing about autism.

OK, first, let me remind us that, while we feel like experts on this subject, there was a time when we too knew nothing about autism.  And I would venture to say that we still wouldn't know anything about it, if we didn't have to.  We should not blame those who are ignorant about ASD ( unless it's your mother-in-law and she's in denial or, better yet, just insisting on being a pain in the a--).  Autism is not going to matter to others unless they see that it matters to us, and that it is worth caring about.  I think that once we are honest and accept that autism is a very hard disorder to get your mind around, then we can be more understanding, and maybe even patient when we come across those who are clueless about it (and say the stupidist things we've ever heard!).  read more »

Dear Parents,For some reason I'm fighting with how I want to begin this blog, so I think the best way is to jump right in....My beautiful son Liam was born January 27th, 2007. I began to worry that something was wrong when he was only 5 months old. Liam hit all his milestones very late, which for a 1st time Mom can be upsetting and frustrating, but for me I always had this nagging feeling that something else was wrong. Of course, the general.."He's just a baby, you put too much pressure on him, all 1st time Mom's worry like you do" would come from everyone I talked to about my concerns. Liam never really made eye contact with me, he never turned to his name, he didn't crawl until he was 14 months, he had unbelievable feeding issues when it came to solid foods, and although he liked having me around it seemed like he didn't care whether I was there or not. It wasn't an issue of Liam hitting milestones or not.. it was all the things I mentioned put together plus a gut feeling that made me bring this up to Liam's Doctor when we were there for his year well-baby visit. She told me that I worry too much and that Liam is just fine. I'm almost glad now that she pissed me off so bad, because it lit a fire. My gut instinct was now screaming at me to get Liam help. I thought, if she doesn't want to listen to me I'll find someone who will. I immediately called up the Doctor that I had when I was a little girl and BEGGED, SOBBED, and PLEADED for him to see Liam.  read more »

JohnPaul received an electric cordless rechargable shaver for Christmas.  His father wanted to be the one to show him how to use it.  He came downstairs today looking very dapper and quite clean-shaven.  It looked like a big success to all.  Then later he needed to be sent upstairs, as he was not behaving, and when I talked to him about his behavior, we got onto the subject of school.  Next year he will go to High School, not sure which one, but he will be in 9th grade, so a school change is in order.  OH dear, the floodgates opened.  He sincerely cried and cried, explaining that he didn't want to get older and change schools, that he needed things to stay the same, that once he moved on, "everything will be lost".  I sat next to him, hugged him, listened to him...he expressed himself very clearly.  I quietly reiterated that he would still change schools (and teachers), but that he was allowed to feel sad, that is OK to do.  As he calmed down, he did get a little testy, asking me what would happen if he shaved off his body hair.  I told him that I would take the shaver away.  A natural consequence, I think.  He thought about it, asked again, and then decided that he would not shave his body hair.  I let him take a bath, and I threw in some baking soda (perhaps it would help him to calm down), and now he is watching a movie with his sisters quietly.

Probably part of the disruption is that it is vacation, which gets boring and there is little routine, and that always gets him out of sorts.  I had forgotten how vacation can affect us...it's never pretty, is it?  I have double the laundry and cooking to do, the kids feel compelled to tell me constantly how bored they are...we aren't purposeful.  I eat more.  I complain more.  I worry more.  I stay up later, and cannot sleep later because the kids get up so darn early to play.  That's vacation for you.  read more »

It's hard to find presents for JohnPaul.  He's still a little kid mentally and emotionally.  Here he is. tall, dark, and hairy, must be at least 5 ft 10 inches tall, and he wishes he lived on the Island of Sodor!  (where Thomas the Tank Engine lives, for those of you who haven't been indoctrinated). 

But wait!  This year it's different.....he actually told us what he wants. 

He wants to shave.

Yikes.  Oh, double-yikes.  I have a flashback to when he was 6 and he found his sister's Bic razor in the shower, and he took off part of his lips.  We found him in the bathroom, bloody and triumphant.  Oh Shit-yikes.  read more »

It doesn't happen that often, but a couple times a year my parents take the kids for the weekend.  It is my 10th wedding anniv. and my hubby and I are alone for the whole weekend.  It is great.  For the first time, I don't miss my kids.  Is that bad of me?  Usually, I only get through a couple of hours before I start missing them. 

Integrating Your Child into the Classroom

When you first begin your one-on-one intensive teaching program with a child with Autism or Developmental Delay, the environment is very structured. Often one child will sit alone at a table with one teacher or therapist. The teacher and student are just a few feet away from each other, to minimize the outside distraction.

As a child progresses, the teaching sessions will gradually become more natural. Perhaps the teacher will stand up and walk around the room. Instructions which were once short, concrete sentences may become longer, multi-part directions. This new structure is intended to simulate a classroom environment, where children must attend to a teacher who is at a distance, working with the entire classroom.

A good way to move toward this integration process is to use items which are familiar to the child from their one-on-one, structured environment, in new and different ways. Accordingly, while the instructions and style of the lessons may be different, the materials used will not pose an added distraction.  read more »

We have had rabbits for pets for about 12 years.  Our first were outside bunnies, which were very unfriendly and generally afraid of us.  They couldn't be cuddles, or even held because they were so frantic to get away from us.  Also, they died gruesome deaths.  Next we had an indoor bunny named Petersam, who litter-box-trained himself and was lots of fun.  Not too cuddly, but had a lot of personality and spunk.  He died this past year (was 7 years old) of asthma.  Meanwhile, we had acquired another outdoor rabbit named Spring.  She was put to sleep yesterday, due to what we think was a brain tumor.  It was as though she had had a stroke...she lost the ability to walk, eat, toilet herself...so sad.  We felt it was important for the kids to still care for her, since this is how life is, but she became so ill that we did need to put her to sleep.  JohnPaul and Dorothy (20) went with me to the vet, and when the doc was administering the final injection to our bunny, I asked JohnPaul if he knew what was happening.  He hesitated, saying "yes", that Spring was going to die.  I asked him what that meant.  He again hesitated, then said he didn't know.  'Will she come back to us like she was before?' I asked.  "no", he said.  'Will she eat and play and breath?' I asked.  "I don't think so "  he said.  "Will she live with us anymore?'  I asked.   "Uh, no."      So he has the general idea, although the concept of death may seem more like being invisable to him than not existing.  I remember when my mother-in-law died, JohnPaul was 9, and he ran around the wake like a nut, commenting that Nana 'was in a bed', and when was she going to get up?  None of the old people at the wake had ever heard of autism, so they thought he was misbehaving terribly and should be spanked.  At the funeral, he wanted to play in the dirt that had been dug up for her burial.  Since th  read more »

    You know how kids are at a young age when you tell them no.  They go ask the other parent.  Well, my husband was taking a nap, so when I told my daughter no to having another candy cane, she only had one option.  Go to her brother.  She did.  She pickded up his keypad asked him if she could have a candy cane.  He told her yes. 

   Now what was I supposed to do?  It was the first time he "talked" to her.  I was so excited, there was only one thing I could do.  I let her have the candy cane.

Hello Friends,

I work for the University Center for Developmental Disabilities at California State University-San Bernardino (UCDD) working with families that have children on the autism spectrum.  I also volunteer several times a year as a Group Director for Autism on the Seas an organization that provides cruise vacation/conferences for special needs families.

I recently met two incredible boys with autism and their mother’s who deal with the daily challenges of raising their sons alone.  Neither of these incredible mothers receives any assistance from the state and work menial jobs from home to support themselves and their sons.  Both women were abandoned by their husbands who could not deal with raising an autistic child, which sadly is much too common in special needs households.     read more »