It's nearly 6:00 p.m. and Wyatt has just recently fallen asleep. I knew his whole sleep routine would be out of whack because of the respite debacle yesterday. I guess his body is tired because he's been up since 2 a.m. and he's had an active day. So I have to let him take at least a little nap before I ruthlessly wake him. The nocturnal cycle must be broken!!!
I spoke with my main mentor-therapist, Brooke, and she said I definitely need to give the respite sitter a firm schedule with a very detailed to-do list. She said if my sitter balks at it, then I will need to find a sitter with more energy.
Perz, I do think my respite sitter has some strong opinions on how things should be done, but she's pretty good about throwing up her hands and saying, "OK, whatever you want. That is fine." The reason why I don't think she's one of those strict 7 p.m. bedtime people is because she's let Wyatt go to sleep as early as 4 p.m. before. That's why we started having her only after 6 p.m. I truly think she bores Wyatt to snores and she likes it that way. If I could have her start coming at 8:30 p.m., that would also solve my problem, but I doubt she would be willing to arrive that late. Her strengths are that she is really safety conscious and she's super about making Wyatt dinner. She's just not much of an entertainer.
My previous respite sitter was not only an entertaining sort who would do art and read books to Wyatt, but she would make my bed and straighten the house up. Oh my goodness, she was the five-foot Fairy Goddess of Respite. But she had to quit because of some personal upheaval in her life.
Cindy, what happened to your respite person?
Oh my gosh, I almost forgot to tell you guys. My neighbors totally complained about Wyatt being up all night. They asked me if I could please keep all of my windows closed for that four or five hours that is the middle of the night. I said, no, I really can't do that because we don't have A/C. I explained that I do not like being up all night either, but that it is something that we are working very hard to not have happen again (or at least often).
Sorry I meant to explain
Sorry I meant to explain what happened. It was just a scheduling problem. We had Anita for
six months. She wants to be a physical therapist. She worked for us thirty hours a month
for $9 an hour and also at a rehab hospital (not drug rehab but physical as in people who
had been in auto accidents). Originally I had her half days Monday and Friday but because
of the cost of gas she wanted to just come Friday for the full day. We had too much down
time, so say Marcel was napping I'd have a tv buddy which kinda got on my nerves. It was
like I had to entertain her during down time. I need somebody thats willing to help
with housework when she's not busy with Marcel. She did help some. Actually the timing was good, the
new administrator at the hospital she works at is getting rid of part timers so she needed
to go to full time anyway. ANYWAY I get to choose my respite care provider. I can pay
her up to $9 an hour and have her thirty hours a month. But Im different than most moms,
I wont leave Marcel in anybodys care and leave the house, I just wont. He's too vulnerable,
besides we were married 19 years when he came along so frankly there's no place we want
to go without him. Anyway thats basically what happened.
I know whatcha mean, feeling
I know whatcha mean, feeling like you have to entertain the sitter. Marc is always 30 minutes late getting home, and the sitter always shows up 5 minutes early. So I always tell Marc, you know you just paid the sitter $5 so she could tell me all about her new sneakers and her nephew's wedding and show me pictures of her dog/grandkids/trip to Paris Disneyland.
We also have the option of hiring someone directly. I can't remember how much the Regional Center pays them. I think it is either $8.50 or $9.50/hr. But if we do that then we are basically switching vendors. That means paperwork which means we have a one month gap in service and must give up that month's hours. But it is good to know that we have that option. If my mother lived in the area, I would hire her for sure.