This is a question I ask my self frequently, I push my autistic child to try new things a lot. This past weekend we were joining the children’s choir at church. Maddie had gone to one other practice the week before but this week she said she did not want to go. She loves to sing and would love to be a part of the performance, I know this because she performed with her religion class last year and loved it. So I needed to figure out why she didn’t want to go to practice.

We went to the practice room after church and most of the kids were already there sitting on the floor. Two girls about Maddie’s age were staring at her and whispering to each other. Maddie became very nervous and started to cling to me hiding her face drawing more and more attention to us.

I walked over to the two little girls and smiled and said “Hi what are your names?” I asked if they knew Maddie and was that why they were looking at her? They didn’t know what to say then one of the girls said I had her in my religion class last year. I said great Maddie has never been in choir before and she may need a little help following along.

Then I approached the teacher and asked her if she could find Maddie a peer to help her follow along and whispered to her that Maddie is autistic and doesn’t read well yet. She was very helpful and found a nice girl that was excited to help. Maddie made it through the practice and felt proud of her self for learning a new song.

I believe in helping to overcome some anxiety to get things started and pushing somewhat. Knowing your autistic child and the limits is important too. Something may work once but the next time you try it, it may not. Just remember to be flexible.