Hi

My Name is Emily and I am 27 years old and mommy to autistic Angel Lilly and also a 6 month old Scarlett!  I have been married for just 4 years.  Lilly was diagnosised when she was 1 1/2 and like many of you I am sure understand my battle daily!  I'm so tired all the time and the meltdowns wear me out!  I joined this site hoping to find other parents to talk to - My husband works 2nd shift and so we see him about 4 hours a day!! FRUSTRATING is not the word that describes how I am feeling not only with trying to make everything work daily with my children but with life in general! My house is a constant clutter it seems that laundry and dusting have become something i try to fit in at 2 or 3 am when the girls may go down! I hate to sound like I am complaining I am just FRUSTRATED right now I have no help from my husband it seems like due to the fact he works which makes me resent him  Oh I just don't know right now!!!! GTG lilly is running in circles screaming!

Choices For Healthy Eating 

If you are interested in buying this book, send your contact info to: glendale70@ymail.com

 Illness is a signal to change. Changing what you eat can be life saving but, at first,  more difficult than all the other changes we may need to face in our lives. This beautifully written book is full of information that will ease your path toward delicious food and discovery of a way of eating that has delivered many people from otherwise complex chronic illness.

Sidney MacDonald Baker        

Co-founder of Defeat Autism Now!

The twins went to sleep around 1 this morning and got up at 6:30. Issac slept with Thane in his twin bed. Issac has torn up another mattress and I just can't put another on in there. There is a graveyard of old mattresses and Issac has made his sizable contribution. I am just at the end of it. He did fine sleeping with Thane.  I think maybe Thane went to sleep a little before Issac and then woke Issac when he awakened. I got up and found Issac had torn off the mattress cover and was trying to tear into Thane's mattress. I took it away from him, put it in Mallie's room and locked the door.

I put in a movie for the boys and tried to lay down on the couch, hoping to catch a few more minutes of sleep, but no luck. Issac came looking for soda this morning. I told him no. He cried a little bit and then launched into a full meltdown. He screamed, cried, tried to bite me and then took off. I caught him tearing the seal off of my dryer door. I got him out of that room and he went back to his room. He started trying to tear up the tiles in his floor. I sat on the tiles and talked to him a little bit. He continually tried to bite me and pinch me. Finally he seemed slightly calmer and I left him alone for a little while. I checked on him every 30 seconds to see if he was going to go back to tearing up the floor. I went and poured him some tea and left it on the counter in the kitchen for him. I went out to meet my neice who was returning my drill. I needed it to fix the paneling that Issac had torn off the wall and the register that he had taken off the floor. While we were on the front porch talking, he brought out a light bulb and broke it on the porch. He seemed calmer tho. 

After my neice left, I fixed the walls, made waffles for Mallie, and fixed the register and the flooring that he had removed. Issac went back to sleep. Maybe when he wakes up we can do this morning over. I hope so. 

I know we all go thru this, but darn it all, I am tired of always being tired.  It ticks me off.  I know I am not alone in this ever present lack of good sleep, so I am finding comfort in knowing we are all struggling with it in one way or another.  I love the support here, and I feel kinda badly because I have not been on much, but whenever I do log on here, I find comfort and support and learn something new.  Thank God for this site and its members.

 My grandfather passed away almost 2 weeks back (which is mainly why I haven't come here as such lately).

 Apart from being devastated about his passing, I was terribly upset when it hit me that my brother would not undertand his absence. Since Karan cannot communicate with us meaningfully, I honestly do not know if he understands what we say apart from the stuff he already knows ... It hurt me to realize that he may not know that his grandfather is not here anymore, and even if he does notice, will he understand what happened to him?

The day of the cremation was crazy hard. We took him, even though it's HOT (about 42-45 degrees celsius), and well, we were quite surprised.  We were all afraid of him acting up, perhaps creating a scene. He was an absolute ANGEL!!! He didn't cry, no even when we removed his shoes to go into the prayer area to pay respects to my grandfather, he placed the garland on his body like we told him to, he even stood quietly in the heat in the cremation area... all without a fuss. It was almost as if he understood that there was a seriousness in the air... love ya bro ...

I guess his autism really hit me hard ... I thought I'd made my peace with it, accepted it, and working towards helping him to become independent. I was, sadly, just plain angry at the fact for a few days after the death.

I don't know what to say now :S

Location(s)

How far would you travel to heal someone you love? An intensely personal yet epic spiritual journey, The Horse Boy (based on the book of the same name by Rupert Isaacson) follows one Texas couple and their autistic son as they trek on horseback through Outer Mongolia in a desperate attempt to treat his condition with shamanic healing. When two-year-old Rowan was diagnosed with autism, Rupert Isaacson, a writer and former horse trainer, and his wife Kristin Neff, a psychology professor, sought the best possible medical care for their son—but traditional therapies had little effect. Then they discovered that Rowan has a profound affinity for animals—particularly horses—and the family set off on a quest for a possible cure….

The Horse Boy is part travel adventure, part insight into shamanic tradition and part intimate look at the autistic mind. In telling one family’s extraordinary story, the film gives voice to the thousands who display amazing courage and creativity everyday in the battle against this mysterious and heartbreaking epidemic. The filmic companion to Isaacson’s best-selling book of the same name and a festival favorite, this ravishing documentary odyssey gives insight into how, in life’s darkest moments, one can find the gateway to joy and wonder.

Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Horse-Boy/88586437853

Official website: http://www.zeitgeistfilms.com/film.php?directoryname=horseboy 

As of June 22, 2009 My book is now on Amazon.com and will also be available around July 5, 2009 on www.helpmychildhasautism.com

One of the things that amaze me about my son are the incredible and profound things he says. It amazes me that someone with this label can produce the things he says.
Lately he asked me where ear wax came from. In an effort to get him the habit of research and not wait for the answers to be fed to him, I told him I do not know and we will have to look it up. He was at the counter at this time I was in the kitchen. He thought very hard about my response and finally said to me. Mom, we need a smart man, I asked why, his response because you always say, you do not know and we have to research it. That is why we need a smart man.

Eric and Dylan went fishing today, nothing new they have been doing this since last year. Today they actually caught not one but 2 fish. Of course there are no pictures (that's Dad for ya). However, Dylan did his thing by holding the fish and politely greeted the fish. Hi Mr fish how are you today, nice to meet you , back to the sea you go, and promptly threw him back into lake Erie.

It seems like we get new people just about every day now. Welcome to our little retreat from reality lol. It's Todds site. We're a friendly bunch. I wanted to take this oppurtunity to include a link to Angel Food Ministries. It's a way to help streach your food dollar a little further. My family has used it once. It's restaurant quality food, plenty of meat. The way the economy is we need to watch out for each other =)

http://www.angelfoodministries.com/menu_0906en.asp

I hired a new respite care provider today. Her name is Cindy. Leah had to quit because of her heath. ANYWAY Cindy mentioned something interesting, that it seems like men with autism tend to be TALL. She knows quite a bit about autism because she volunteered at the ARC here in town and her ex's brother is autistic. She said every man she's met with autism is TALL and some are very TALL. Just thought I'd bring it up. Perz your son is tall isnt he?

I got up this morning to Thane ticked off because I disconnected his tv. I disconnected it because he likes to turn the volume all the way up and then it blares throughout the house. He punched me in the stomach while I was asleep. This is a wonderful way to wake up. I made him leave my room and locked him out. This made him frustrated, but no angrier. He is really having a problem with hitting lately, but it is a hit once and that's it. He does not continue it. He used to be really bad, but the dr put him on respirdal and now it is controllable.

When I left my room, I discovered Issac tearing into his mattress. I moved it into Mallie's room and he will get it back tonight at bedtime. I am going to duct tape it back together for tonight and hope that the mattress I am getting from his father survives longer than this one did. I am still waiting for the seamstress to finish the mattress cover. She did get it done, but the zipper was not long enough so back it went. This time, we are waiting on the zipper. We just have to survive until then. Some days I feel like that is all I am doing is surviving from one day to the next. Others, I feel like there is a plan that we are following and we are not doing so bad. Today is a survive day evidently.   read more »

The book is now available in paperpack!

How to Set Up a Work Area at Home for a Child with Autism: A Manual for Parents, Family Members and In-Home Support Providers

How to Set Up a Work Area at Home for a Child with Autism is a must have guide for parents, family members, and in-home support workers looking to create a work space for a child with autism. The book is filled with practical advice such as tips for teaching basic skills, sample charts for charting progress, and ideas for encouraging independent skills. Each chapter provides strategies and techniques to enhance the delivery of the home instruction.
The book is 66 pages long and is an easy read.  It can be found on the AutismClassroom.com website (now) or on Amazon.com (July).

http://www.autismclassroom.com/home/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=115&Itemid=90

About the author:
S. B. Linton has worked with children with autism for over 10 years. She has a Master's Degree in Teaching Students with Severe Disabilities and a Graduate Certificate in Teaching Individuals with Autism Spectrum Disorders from Johns Hopkins University. Linton's undergraduate degree is in Special Education from Bloomsburg University of Pennsylvania. Linton is the author of two other books: How to Set Up a Classroom for Students with Autism and Functional Behavior Assessments & Behavior Intervention Plans. She currently works as an Autism Instructional Specialist and consults with school teams in matters related to teaching students with autism.

anyone have tips on taking a pacifier away from an extremely oral little gal named Kaylee?

I am thinking about ideas myself, a gradual process kinda thing...anyone have an idea that worked with their child...she will be three in august and off to school...she would keep it in her mouth all day and all night if I let her...but I try to snag it as often as I see it hanging loosely in her mouth...not in use...but still, she is sooooo oral, I am wondering if anyone has any thoughts to share.

If there is one thing I have learned over the years, it's this......"time flies whether you're having fun or not!"

My husband and I have been married 36 years today.   Quite a feat this day and age.  Our little girl is going to spend the night with her Mommie , so Papa and I plan an evening out.   Nothing fancy ....just dinner and a visit with friends.   After that...alone time at home together.

For you much younger members.....enjoy where you are now.   You have NO IDEA how fast it is going to pass.

My husband, Mark told me today that he is needed at the other restaurant his boss owns which is about an hour away from here for awhile and that they are letting us stay in a cabin up there, so I need to pack our bags... he has to be there on July 2.  This doesn't give me much time to prep Seth and I hope he will manage the change even if it's temporary.  Seth and I can only stay until just before school starts in August so I am hoping Mark will be done up there by then. This might be fun, IT IS A RESORT with lots to do, Whitewater rafting (for the brave... the water is always COLD!) horseback riding which might be something Seth would like, Tennis, pool, playground and other stuff.  My older son is staying at the house to take care of the pets and I will be checking in periodically but I will miss reading what's going on at AB.... I know I should break down and get a laptop someday HA HA  Don't forget to add some humor everyday...Keep Smiling :)

The WSNAS now have a Facebook group for members to chat and inform.

Vist it us at : http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=98967015795

The West Suffolk branch of the National Autistic Society have held a Gala Reception in the Atheneum, Bury St. Edmunds.

Many local important people attended, including the Deputy Mayor and representatives from mental health services, childrens services and large local empolyeers.

For more information have a look at the post blog which has pictures

http://wsnas.blogspot.com/2009/06/gala-recprion-to-introduce-west-suffolk.html

Has anyone read this magazine? I ran into a copy at my dr's office and thot is was way cool.... anyone else read this?

Good news from the allergy dr! Issac was supposed to be on a 5 yr plan with the allergy shots, but it now looks more like a 3 yr plan. Considering it has been 2 1/2 yrs so far, that is good news for us! I took the boys to the allergy dr on Tuesday and Issac looks really really good. His meltdowns have almost completely disappeared. He was having about 6 meltdowns a day that lasted anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hrs each and now he has one only when he gets really mad, maybe 1 every 6 weeks or so. Allergy shots really worked for him.

I did get the Carhart mattress cover from the seamstress on Monday, but unfortunately the seam where the zipper is sewed in did not stand the stress of putting the mattress into it. Of course, I think a longer zipper would have worked better. Do the math, 28" zipper, 36" mattress? How was this supposed to work? Yeah, we tried folding the mattress and putting it in there, that is how the seam ripped. Now her idea is to put a 73" zipper down the side.... the mattress is 72".  Any opinions? I think I am still going to have problems. She is not taking into account the width of the mattress when she figures in the length of the zipper.

Meanwhile, I am getting ready to toss another mattress as Issac tore into it Monday night. Fortunately for me their father is moving and selling everything in his place. I am buying the kids' mattresses off of him really cheap so I will have another one or two, but I just want the mattress cover fixed so I can quit messing with this problem. I am also getting one of his tvs as you remember that I don't have the one because I had one die on me. Now, unfortunately, their father is leaving. This means, no more big long weekend breaks as he is moving to Chicago where his family is. The only other option is to move him in with me and there are a lot of reasons that is NOT a good idea. Anybody out there who is divorced can probably name 5 to start with.  read more »

Todays  trip to the autism specialist was a wonderful success!!   The doctor and PA were delighted with Trinitys progress...She actually DID give her doctor a big hug.  Since she would not even acknowledge the doctor on the last visit...wouldn't talk, walk or cooperate in ANY way; today was HUGE!    Meds got increased a tiny bit.   Hopefully that will stop some odd behaviours.   ( She is into kissing everything right now.) Got to get that under control...doors, walls , tables.....WAY too many germs out there for that to continue.   Anyway....thanks for listening. 

Okay, so the VBS week is not over yet, but I can alway tell its a success! I wrote a note and talked to the head of the program so that all the helpers got the same note. Which was: warn ahead of time when an activity is going to change, and let him know if he can save an activity to finish later. So when I went to pick him up today, a teacher walk over to him and sweetly says:

"zare, your mommy is here, but you have a couple minutes to finish your project okay?"

I love it when adults follow directions! Hooray!

Lets hope each camp is hosted by listening/reading people!

You can help your child with autism lower their stress level with some simple rules about family TV watching.

As a child and now an adult with autism and sensory processing disorder, I know that TV can be stressful to the point of jumping, tears, anger, confusion, and other reactions.   As an adult, I have learned to contain some of my reaction in front of others, but children don’t necessarily have that regulation built in yet.   Also, while watching TV, I will start to feel upset. I often don’t realize what is bothering me early on, but I have learned to identify my own signs.

When my hubby and his kids are talking and watching sports, I have to leave the room, close the door, and go away because my aggravation from the sound continues to elevate until it boils.

A child may not know that they can leave the room to a quieter place.  A family member may even tell the child to stay in that room or the TV may be audible throughout the house, so the child has no escape from the sound.  With the noises from the TV, the child’s irritability can climb all day.

Here are some TV rules that could make your child’s life much more relaxed:  read more »

I first tried a weighted blanket in Sensory Integration Therapy.  My occupational therapist recommended that I get one, so I did--five times.  But, with my sensory issues and my autistic sense, none of them were "right" so I designed my own.

They became popular so I made an online store and started selling them at Cozy Calm.  People buy them (a lot!) so they can relax, get to sleep, and stay asleep.  The deep pressure from our weighted blankets called proprioceptive input, induces the brain to produce serotonin and dopamine (the calming chemicals) and melatonin (the sleep chemical).

Features:

• Machine wash and dry
• Even weight distribution
• Soft
• Professionally sewn
• High-quality fabrics
• Inner liner for strength
• The filling is plastic beads that come from an American company (for safety)
• They're gorgeous!

You can see them in my store: Cozy Calm

You can contact me directly at e@cozycalm.com or at 763-533-6125.

I hope you like them!

--Eileen.

This is a very touching story:

When Rupert Isaacson decided to take his five-year-old son on a three-week trek across Mongolia on horseback, it wasnt just his friends who thought hed gone crazy. His wife Kristin was appalled. Rowan was autistic: incontinent, uncommunicative and given to fearsome bouts of nerve-shredding screeching, even at home...

continue reading on TimesOnline

The book

As I promised Seth, the day after my older son graduated from high school we went camping.  We used to set up a tent but Seth would never stay all night in it so about 2 years ago we bought a used 10 ft. camper which is just enough for us.  He loves it because he has his own bunk above our bed. We don't go far because my husband still had to work everyday and I am able to stop by the house if I needed anything.  This year was not like the last couple though, Seth didn't like anyone to be there. A little boy would ride by on his 4 wheeler and Seth hid in the camper...On Friday night more campers came in and he said he wanted to go home...Saturday he stayed with his big brother and I started getting things put away at the campground and told the host we were leaving on Sunday.  I'm not sure why he wasn't as happy this time.  His dad had to work the whole time we were there so he only saw him about 1 hour in the morning right before he left for work and when he got off work Seth was asleep. (the curse of being a chef is LONG HOURS) My logic was if the boys weren't happy then why be there especially when I was the one chopping wood...ha ha  I am wondering about Regression and if it is normal with autism.  I know he's not social with kids but now it's adults too.  He has made such great progress when it comes to talking, communicating and being loving with us but that's about it.  My parents came up from FL for the graduation and he didn't interact much with them.  It's really hard sometimes to watch that and know I can't do anything about it.  Anyway, I have other projects this summer to do with him and we have his workbooks from school to help keep him on some kind of routine.  By the way, I am also on Facebook... cj.counts@yahoo.com Keep Smiling...:D

I was talking to my sons ABA supervisor frusterated at the fact whenever I am driving my son would randomly unbuckle his seat belt and stand up. I didnt know what to do because I kept having to pull over and fix it. Sometimes it would take a while since I was in traffic sometimes and couldnt get over. SOOOO she told me about an amazing product called Angel Guard. You can google it. It fits over the buckle so little hands cant unbuckle their belts, keeping them safe. I havent tried it yet, but I am sure odering it! https://www.angelguardbuynow.com/?cid=632863

It has been awhile since I have posted. I recently found out I was expecting my third child and have had several health issues going on with the family.

Vincent still has not been seen at Riley Childrens hospital. We are still waiting on a referral. However at this point he has been diagnosed with developmental and speech delay. His behavior has actually been improving, though still needs a  lot of improvement.

Please keep him in your prayers as he is also having to see a pediatric Cardiologist for a heart murmur that is worsening and also that we can find a doctor that is concerned about his well being.

Thanks!

mvanpelt07

well, we are off to the autism specialist tomorrow.  It has been 5 months since we saw her.   So much progress in that time.  I really haven't discussed it here....but...Trin regressed to the point of refusing to walk, talk , etc. last year.   She became a child we literally did not know.   I know these are statements that most parents and grand parents say when the child is about 2.   Our girl always did so good.  Mainstreaming in school.   Sweetest little thing you ever met.   Hugs and kisses for everyone.     That went away too.   Replaced with aggression and anger.  Fits of rage became the norm.  Biting, kicking......you name it...it was hell on earth.   The last trip to the doctor...this child had to be carried in.  She asked me today if she can hug the doctor.....Praise God.....She is walking again and only sometimes complains that she "can't walk".   I have learned over the past months just how painful autism can be.   I  have nothing but praise for the caregivers, parents and grand parents of these awesome kids.     Just wanted to share.  

I am just wishing I felt more energetic.  A series of crummy things have all happenned at once, so yes, when it rains it pours.  I guess it's easier to get the rough stuff all over with at once so you can get a break from it and enjoy and appreciate the good times.  I am determined to lift my dark mood today by just goofing off as much as possible and appreciating my kids for the fabulous people that they are.  Getting the focus on them should help for certain.  I hope everyone had good Fathers' Days.  We let Mickey just lounge and nap and watch TV instead of working on anything around here...he really appreciated it.

So yeah i started an autism awareness group so what right?  I feel like it's just a load of crap im hauling around a town that turns their heads the other way or smile and nod at me with that blank stare of being somewhere completely else.  So I'm throwing a party for the whole entire county, a pot luck party because i can't afford to buy much of anything like the rest of us folks that have our finances dedicated to our children.  I don't know if anyone will show up or if it will be just me and my kids at the stupid park.  I am inviting everyone i suppose the worst that will happen is that everyone and the dogs will show up right?  then what do i do, i can't feel pitty for myself then can i.  Boy this sucks, i don't even know what im doing anymore.  well here is to luck!  June 30th here we come!

Hello,

Has anyone had any experience with Auditory Integrative Training therapy?  

Information on AIT:  http://www.aithelps.com/

My name is Mike. I live in Palmdale, CA. I am 22 years old and have ADHD and Asperger's Syndrome (a form of Autism). I live with a roommate, and work a full-time job. I am here to ask serious advice about dating.

I have been single since November 2005. I broke up with my last girlfriend because I had no time for her, and wanted to finish high school as soon as possible.

Recently, in May, after having no contact or having any kind of "more than friend" talking or hookups, I met someone who was almost perfect for me. We had everthing in common, there was very little that we disagreed on. We went on two dates, and it was all going well. She then came over to my mom's house, and we watched a movie together. I did nothing to her at all except watch the movie. The reason is because she wanted to take things slow. I highly respect that. She then left, after being over for a couple hours. I thought it went perfect. I don't get why, but when she came over to meet my mom, my mom said I sounded overbearing. I had no clue what my mom was talking about, because I was being as nice as possible the entire time. I really thought this girl was amazing, and I thought she thought the same. The next day at work, I get a very long text message on my phone basically stating that she wanted nothing to do with me. I forgot to mention that about two weeks into talking, I told her that I have Asperger's Syndrome, and educated her about it, and she was fine with it.  read more »

Hello,

I'm interested in starting the oral chelation drops and clay baths for my 11 yr. old son.

Dose this stuff really work?

The vacation was fun, but it seemed like we just picked the wrong time to do it! We started out and within the first hour ran into and traveled with our first major thunderstorm. We traveled thru the wind and rain for at least an hour. That was scary, but the kids handled it well. We stopped at the first rest stop after the storm. Everything was wet and of course Issac had to go down the slide so I had to change his clothes.

Arriving in Chicago, we went directly to Shedd Aquarium, where we stood in line for 2 hours. The boys did ok with this. Issac handled it much better than Thane. Thane wanted to run into the building within 5 minutes. Seth was a huge help to me in keeping him close by. The Shedd was awesome as always. It is something I definitely want to do again.  The twins really liked the bigger animals. Thane really wanted to run threw it and I had an interesting time keeping him close by. We still got thru the whole thing in 2 hours. If we had stayed for the show, it would have been longer. 

We went to our hotel, the kids swam and we ran out for supper. Everyone wanted something different to eat. Nobody was happy to eat at the same place. Ugh! Finally returned to swim again and everyone was out by midnight. The beds were wonderful, the pillows undescribable. I think if we could have bought them and taken them home, we would have. Just so comfy!  read more »

Choices For Healthy Eating 

If you are interested in buying this book, send your contact info to: info@autismcentreofcanada.org 

Illness is a signal to change. Changing what you eat can be life saving but, at first,  more difficult than all the other changes we may need to face in our lives. This beautifully written book is full of information that will ease your path toward delicious food and discovery of a way of eating that has delivered many people from otherwise complex chronic illness.

Sidney MacDonald Baker        

JohnPaul (aged 14 and has autism) and I (his mom) went to the library one school night.  I had HAD it at home, and was looking to get out of the house for a little while.  He was my trusty sidekick.  We hung out in the childrens' room, then we looked for DVD's.  We noticed another "big kid" with his mom at the check out.  When we were in the car, JohnPaul commented that the "big kid' had gotten a Thomas the Tank Engine movie. Well, he probably has autism, I said.  (otherwise, what teenager in his right mind would be taking out a Thomas Movie).

Somehow, probably because I had knocked back a few glasses of wine, I got up the nerve to ask my son "who else do you know that has autism?"

He named t he kids in his autism class.  And he named himself.   !!    wow.  Hardly daring to breath, I asked him "so what is autism?"

He thought for a moment, and then he said "Someone with a little kid inside of them."

I cried all the way home from the library.  Didn't get a ticket, thank goodness.  My son is teaching me so much.

How else would you describe someone who has social and communication deficits?

My second eldest daughter turned 18 today, and also graduated from high school.  She is a real go-getter;

she waitresses and will probably pay for her community college degree or her car, or both.  I am so amazed at her resiliance.  She developed excema all over her body when she was 4 (severe food allergies), then later on developed asthma.  She has outgrown both as long as she is careful about her diet.  She is very good with her brother who has autism...she cheers him on, and can be stern with him as well.  She is an amazing artist, and plays violin like a professional.  We went to her graduation, then out to lunch.  All she wants, I think, is to be loved.  God help me to give her that, and to be a good parent to her.

   read more »

Sometimes I get so caught up in trying to overcome the behaviors in Caden that lend themselves to autism that letting him just be a child is lost in transit. I find myself questioning his behavior meaning I find myself asking whether his behavior is of the kind you would see in a typical 3.5 year old or is it more closely attributed to his autism?   I usually fault on the side of chalking it up to autism which means that instead of giving him a "free pass" he winds up in a timeout.  Am I too hard on him - too black and white?  I am still searching for that middle ground.   If I think he is engaging in a behavior that we are trying to stop (e.g., being controlling), he goes to timeout because I worry that if I don't it will undue all the hard work of his therapists.  As a result, I feel like I am slowly chipping away at the trust he has in me.  I want him to always feel like my arms are always open for him but am having a difficult time with setting the parental boundaries.   He frequently tells me that he is sad and I got to admit, it would be hard if someone was always watching my every move.  So the rest of this week I am going to try to bring more light than darkness to his life and hope that I hear more laughs from him than tears of frustration. If only I could look into that magic snow globe and know that he is going to be alright.  

Yes, this actually happened.  read more »

I really have no idea how I am supposed to react to this but my sons teacher calls me and says that the class is going on a field trip. We just moved here so I was thrilled because he had not gone on one in his other school yet. She explained how they were going to a baseball game to teach the kids about baseball and my response to that was excitement that Gaven would get to see a real baseball game. She then informed me that she was not comfortable with him going and wanted to know if I could either keep him home or she would leave one of her aides behind for him at school.  Her excuse was that he was too unpredictable and needed constant supervision. I then wondered if you could leave an aide for him at school why could this aide not go with him to the game? I was so shocked that I just kind of went along with her but I really felt like he was being left out. But he really did not get left out because she was nice enough to have him fill out a name tag as if he were actually going to the game. When I flipped the tag over it had his school address written by him and phone #. Why would she be so cruel as to make him go through the motions as if he were getting to go? So if anyone might understand the inner workings of a special ed teacher and why they do not consider other peoples feelings I would really like to know.

I am the unofficial greeter lol. It's Todds site. We all love Todd =) He's done a wonderful thing, making a site where we all feel safe and secure. Enjoy =)

So here I was, already to chat about the last day of school, when I have two poopy boys 5 minutes apart.

 Little Brother is 3 and has no interest in sitting on the potty. He poops a full load and  runs away from me, I have to tackle him and change him.

Wash my hands and then I see zare in THAT STANCE. Hunched over a book with arched back and straight legs. "zare are you pooping? Do you need to go the potty?" He shakes his head, no mom. Of course I should have just said, go, because then he grunts. "Zare go potty NOW." He screeches at me, my fully verbal boy does his velociraptor screech and goes potty.

"hey mom." now a calm boy again

"what honey" says tired mom.

"swim goggles for kids." I look in the bathroom, he's reading a flyer for walgreens.

Haircuts. I remember actually having to hold the kids down (this takes two people) to cut their hair. I remember that we could really only give them buzz cuts because everything else was laughable while you are holding them down. This has gotten so much better. Now, I take them outside on the back porch and use the electric trimmers to cut their hair. They stand still without moving their heads too much. I cut their hair about 1 time a month. I have never taken them to a barber or stylist. I would love to hear if anyone has had good luck with this!

 Nail Trimming. yeah, that's a laugh isn't it. I remember holding arms and legs between my legs and having their father hold their bodies down so that we could trim their nails. It took about 15 minutes per child if you had them securely. If you didn't, boy, what a fight! Now, both boys just have to be shown the clippers. I show them and they come over and watch me trim the nails on their fingers. Thane still has a little resistance to the toes, but one they are done, he seems fine. He just keeps jerking his toes away. This makes it harder to cut the nails, but not impossible. He is not screaming or crying. What a relief!

Keeping toys, condiments, and other small objects put away. I remember having to return my condiments to the fridge about 5 or more times a day. It was just annoying. It was shortly after they were diagnosed that they started doing this. It just no longer happens. They rarely play with toys anymore. They just have a huge toybox full of stuff they never touch. That means they don't pick it up anymore and neither do I. It does make me wonder tho, why do they never play with toys? Has anyone else run into this?  read more »

All these articles on people not getting enough sleep, like we parents are puposefully trying to stay up all night. They drive me crazy! Issac was up until 2:30 last night. Thane got up at 6:30. I feel like I am logging thru and it is only 8. We are going on vaca tomorrow and I have got to get a nap in today. Are there really parents out there who plan to only get about 4 hrs of sleep? and if so, why? Issac was up late, but I did not have to change his sheets even once and the mattress and the bed and the cover are all intact. Yippee!!!!!!!! Of course, yesterday he tried to remove the wire I have on his window so he could take off his screen, then when I stopped him, he went in and poured half a gallon of juice down the sink. At least it a was down the sink and not on the floor. So much easier to clean up. Not that I am thrilled about the juice or the screen, but both were reasonably easy to repair and replace. 

http://www.brighttots.com/Genes   this is amazing...what a cool grandfather....anyone have this for their child?  if so, tell us about how it works for your kid!

http://www.brighttots.com/Genes

There is a lot to read here, but some very interesting, though provoking information and statistics.  Worth the read.

Hello!

Well I'm new here and very excited to be meeting so many wonderful people who are going thru some of the same experiences I am.  One recent experience, I'm pregnant and I'm a little nervous about it. I have a 3 year old Autistic son named Andrew. He is the most special gift I could ask for. I love him so much and although we've had our rought times, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I know I was ment to be his mom and he was ment to be my son.

That being said, I know the chances of me having another Autistic child is alot higher. My husband and I held off at first because Andrew required so much extra attention and I didn't want to deprive him of his mom. I wanted to give him everything I had and it worked.  He's doing so great, sometimes I shocked! I'm so grateful that this pregnancy came when it did because I really think a sibling would be great, but on the flip side I'm terrified. If this child is autistic, I will love him/her just as much and I will cherish them just as I have with Andrew. But I won't lie and say I don't want this child to be "typical" or that I don't pray to God every night that they spare this child from all the difficulties Andrew has had.

I was hoping I might talk to some of you out there who have gone thru the experience of pregnacy after a diagnosis of Autism in your family. What you did differently, how you coped with the stress and how your autisic child adapted. 

Thank you!

Ok, so we use melatonin for Michael, I have said this before.  We do not use it on Kaylee because she will fall asleep at night without it on her own.  However, she does not ever nap in the day, and I really feel like if she would nap, she would have better quality sleep at night, not so much getting in and out of bed.  Mickey is in her room on a mattress to stop her from leaving the room, so the middle of the night partying is not happening here anymore...but, I am wondering the following...Has anyone ever used the melatonin in the day to get a child to take a nap?  Since the melatonin just helps kids settle down to sleep, could it maybe work?  Is it worth a try or not a good plan to even start?  Michael is now napping on his own in the day, most days, so it's just for Kaylee, who still doesn't stay asleep all night long.  Thoughts, opionions....launch them my way!

I had to get the kids involved in cleaning up the house and moving various pieces of furniture around in order to get it done. I had purchased a small coffee table that now serves to hold our tv because Thane kept wanting to slam the big entertainment center up against the wall. This was the second one he had destroyed. I had gone to two auctions this weekend looking for a bed that Issac could not destroy. I thot I had found one, it was an old antique iron bed. I bought it at an auction. The pieces don't fit together. They are from different beds. Bummer! Now what? I am still searching for a bed for Issac. I had the beds arranged so that my daughter was the one without a bed and she was sleeping with me. Thinking I had a bed, I moved her bed back and Seth's bed back and now Issac doesn't have a bed. Ugh, all that moving for nothing!

I called the lady who is constucting my mattress cover out of Carhart material and she is doing June weddings and estimates that it will be done next monday. Well, that means surviving last night and tonight without it. I hope. Wednesday the kids will be at their father's house. Thursday and Friday we will be back in Chicago and Friday to Monday the kids are supposed to be with their father for Father's Day weekend. 

Yes, we are going back up to Chicago. We are going to see Shedd Aquarium and the zoo. I am wondering if we can do it in one day the way the kids zip right thru the places. It might be too much tho. Their father talked about meeting us up there on Friday as he was planning to go up to see his father, but with his car broke down, I don't see how he can. We'll see. We are excited about this trip. Really excited. We have seen the Shedd Aquarium, but my youngest, Mallie, doesn't remember it.  read more »

Caden has been quoting lines from his favorite videos, totally out of context.  I have been feeling a bit frustrated because I am having a difficult time explaining to him that other kids don't know what he is talking about when he suddenly blurts out "what did the customer say" (a line from Ratatouille).  I know my husband will quote things from movies when he is around his friends but I firmly believe this isn't a genetic "male" thing that I should just turn a blind eye to.  So do I stop letting Caden watch videos, ignore it and hope it goes away, try to do "something" about it, or chalk it up to another one of his quirky traits that makes him who he is?

I find myself often overwhelmed with all the work involved with having autism in our family, twice over.  It seems there as an endless list of behaviors to work on correcting, food issues, therapy time on my own and with the therapists, and then you add in just the normal upkeep of a home with kids in it.  I feel like I just can not ever keep it all up.  So, instead of getting all overwhelmed and exhausted from trying to be this supermom, I am beginning to see that it is ok to just take babysteps.  I am making a list now each day with what has to be done and what can be done when there is time in the day leftover.  For example, my dishes have to be done or I run out of needed items, but cleaning my floor three times a day on my hands and knees is not a necessity.  If I use the time I usually use to do this three times a day to do some sensory therapy combined with speech work instead, I will feel better and my back won't hurt so badly.  It won't kill anyone to step in a smeared popsicle.  I can clean it once at night thoroughly, and spot clean/sweep throughout the day instead.  This will take great restrain on my part, but I know I can do it.  This will free up some of my time.  So, my goal in these next few weeks is to slow me down with the cleaning obsession and allow my kiddos more mommy time.  I am also going to start having a day of cooking ahead of time, and freezing up meals.  I did this before when I was pregnant with Alex on bedrest.  Mickey's mom and I cooked all day on Sundays to have meals ready to pull from the freezer and heat up.  It worked, but I fell out of the habit once back on my feet again.  Why stop a plan that worked?  Guilt.  And I have no room for all this mommy guilt anymore in my brain...so I am going to try to kick that guilt out the door and replace it with Way to Go Mommy thoughts whenever it creeps in.  I know I am a good mom, so the guilt has got to go.  I know I bust my butt for all 5 of my kids, so I  read more »

New Book Addresses the Need for Quality Autism Instruction

Baltimore, MD – June 9, 2009 -  AutismClassroom.com has launched a new book for educators, administrators and parents that provides practical, hands-on information about the elements needed in a classroom that provides instruction to students with autism.  Due to the continuous increase in students with autism in school systems throughout the world, the need for quality autism classrooms is at its highest.  School systems around the globe are struggling to fill this need.  The book How to Set Up a Classroom for Students with Autism, addresses this need.  

Parents, administrators and teachers often want to provide the best education for their student, but do not know where to start.  Some school systems are located in areas where access to training in the area of autism is limited or where the cost of sending employees to trainings is  too much.  Unless the teacher has been trained specifically in working with students with autism, chances are that a new teacher is experiencing many issues related to challenging behaviors, student motivation, classroom organization and student progress.  How to Set Up a Classroom for Students with Autism, offers a solution: A Mentor Teacher in a book!  read more »

So many times I blog out of frustration but today is the start of something new!  Today I am sharing what a blessed day we had!  Cj spoke several sentences today, granted it wasn't completely clear, but I felt like we carried on a conversation for the first time! :) We were able to get outside and enjoy beautiful weather and enjoy each other's company.  He was able to swim and I was able to sit on the sidelines and watch him! :)  It was just a glorious day and I had to share. 

Here's one for all you creative problem solvers out there.  Kaylee is big into oral sensory.  She mouths anything and everything.  She is currently crumbling all food I give her into tiny pieces and then eating it.  So, I tried crumbling it nicely for her in a bowl or plate first.  These get thrown on the floor. (No! No! I am screaming in my head.)  I tell her quietly but firmly that it needs to stay at the table, and we have meltdown city.... for sometimes 45 minutes till I just let her do it because I can not take any more crying.  So, I am aware that this is not helping.  So, what do I do?  She is not stopping with my coaching.  I would love any and all help, PLEASE!!

I always figured toileting was pretty straightforward.  You know - you sit or you stand...either way, you're gonna pee or poop.  Was I wrong!!!

I am just beginning to see how complex toileting really is.  My eyes have been opened.  And I have been feverishly writing social stories and developing training for my students ever since...well, here's the story:

I'm a speech tx in a K-4 school.  Every autism classroom has a bathroom, and that has been really nice, let me tell you!  The preschool children who have autism have a teeny-tiny toilet, and a bathroom fully stocked with pull-ups, wash gear, and extra clothes for all.  The k-2 autism class has a medium-sized toilet with similar accessories, just no diapers.  Our 3-4th grade autism class has a bathroom with a regular-sized toilet and drawers for each student with brush, comb, tooth brush, and deoderant.  But this year we discovered that our 3rd and 4th graders do not use the regular restrooms.  Yes, our kids come all the way back from mainstream class and use our class bathroom.  When asked why they don't use the hallway bathrooms, they responded  "What bathrooms?"

Hoo boy.  Have we been enabling their dependence on us and our safe little classroom all these years?  We're afraid the answer is YES.  This could certainly be part of the reason why our boys tend to pull their pants all the way to ankles to go, whether they are in a stall or at a urinal.  And there is nothing funnier for other kids than seeing one of our students standing at a urinal with his bum fully exposed.  This was actually misconstrued as "exposing one's self" at our middle school.  I panicked!  Then, I got into the groove, or should I say, followed the flow of "restroom zen".  Come with me now:  read more »

This is what we learned about confusion arousals at the sleep clinic.  Confusion arousals occur in children 6 months old to 6 years.  They occur within the first third and occaisonally the middle third of the night during non-REM sleep.  Child appears to be confused, agitated "possessed."  Your child may go into crying and thrashing.  The child may back arch, yet remain asleep.  Your child may not recognize his/her parents.  They may push away from their parents.  These episodes usually last between 1-10 minutes but can last up to 40 minutes.  The episode ends abruptly and the child falls back into a deep sleep.  The recommendation the RN gives is this.  Do not try to wake your child.  Stand back and then let the event run its course.  The more intervention on the parents' part, the longer it will last.  Avoid touching your child at all because this along prolongs the length of the episode usually resulting in more crying and thrashing and back arching.

 The RN also told us that these arousals can occur in any child, a few times a year, as a result of inadequate sleep.  However, if a child is obtaining plenty of sleep and the arrousals are still happening, she says to seek professional help for your child.  These confusion arousals are more frequent and often relentless in a child who is not getting enough sleep on a regular basis. (Like our Michael)  Thus, she says in this type of case, seek help from a pro.  This info came in a packet from the Sleep Medicine and Research Center at St. Luke's Hospital, St. Louis MO.

This was interesting for me to find out.  I know about identical twins sending vibes to each other.  I did not know that fraternal twins did it as well.  According to our sleep doc, Nancy, they do.  She said if you have twins or multiples with sleep issues, you have to separate them.  Otherwise, one is up, the other(s) are sure to follow.  Then you have what we had, everyone up instead of sleeping.  So, she suggests, separate rooms, and white noise in both rooms.  She also make the bedroom just a place for sleeping to start with.  Don't put toys in there or other distractions.  Box of books, the favorite blankets or stuffed animal...and a bed.  With this in mind, we are now moving Joseph, our 16 year old to the basement and giving Michael and Kaylee rooms of their own, rooms not next to each other either.  Alex will go back in our room.  When we have several weeks of successful sleeping all night, we will stop the cosleeping with a parent on a mattress and try having them sleeping on their own all night, with a whole new set of instructions and tips to accomplish this.  It is a lot of work, a lot of steps, but I am so grateful for this help.  It is a long road still, but at least we are on the road.

The issue that we focused on the most at our meeting, was Michael's need for motion to fall asleep.  He needs the swing to fall asleep is what we told Nancy.  She proceeded to let us know we had dug our own grave on this problem for Michael.  She was full of humor and kindness but bursting with facts that made sense.  For Michael, falling asleep in the swing means that when he awakens from sleeping at night, he cannot get back to sleep again without the same motion.  Of course!  It made complete sense, that like a baby that needs bounced, rocked, jiggled, the car, a swing to fall asleep, the baby awakens and needs the same thing.  The need is great for them.  But, we made it so.  So, to stop it, what did we do?  Well, taking the swing away from our Michael would be too cruel, too much change.  We started backwards then, at the root of the problem and this is what we do now. We give him his melatonin.   We give him a timer with ten minutes on it.  (we are now down to 7 minutes because you take a minute away each night)  When the timer buzzes, he is out of the swing for the night.  Then, he is allowed to lay in his tub, lay in his ball pit or curl up with me on the couch.  Once asleep, we move him to our room, and I cosleep with him.  He falls asleep knowing I am there, he awakens and I am there...that is the theory.  I recently told a new mom of twins that the biggest advice I had for her was to teach her babies to fall asleep without the motion, on their own.  Eventually we will get the timer to have just a few minutes on it, then none.  But we are not to rush this issue with him.  So, so far this is a working routine for him.  I will blog later about what she had to say about the issue of twins in the same room.

This is about the woman we got help from for Kaylee and Michael with their sleep issues, or rather lack of sleep issues.  Nancy Birkenmeir.  This is a link to an article about her.  The things we learned were dumbfounding, eye opening and extremely helpful.  It's on our shoulders as parents to help our kids learn to sleep properly.  We have to help them.  This woman has changed my life with her insight.  I will forever be grateful to her.

http://www.columbiamissourian.com/stories/2008/12/28/sleep-lady-st-louis-solves-snoozing-issues/

I went to Fairfield, IL and picked up the Carhart material and dropped it off with the seamstress on Wednesday evening. I stopped by yesterday and she has cut it out, but not started putting it together. I am really hoping she gets the mattress cover done early next week as Issac is really leaving the sheets alone, but I fear for the next mattress. I truly do hope that this does the trick. I decided to use a sheet blanket for the side of Issac's blanket that is made out of the Carhart material. The seamstress is going to sew it on like a quilt by making it look like squares. I hope this works. I really really hope it does. I am thinking if this goes well, we will make one (a mattress cover) for Thane's bed because if Issac realizes that he cannot tear up his bed, he may try to tear up Thane's as they are in the same room and all.

We are missing the Superman Celebration because of the storms rolling thru our area and lack of someone to go with me. I wanted to go yesterday and didn't get to go. I even asked their father to go, but even tho he can't go to work because his car is broke down, he wouldn't go. Bummer! Oh, his court date was just a continuance so as of right now, he is still a free man and his next court date is the end of this month.   read more »

I should have posted this sooner, but I have used this product and it has been a godsend for us!  If any of you out there have an autistic child who wanders, know that you are not alone.  My son will wander off anywhere and is not afraid of anything.  I was about at my wit's end and then I came across the portable playard! :) It is a three foot tall fence that is about 36 square feet if you buy the extension (which we did) and it hooks together.  We took it camping with us, threw in his favorite toys and voila!  We had a happy guy who couldn't wander off.  I took it to my daughter's ballgames, camping, family parties, etc...We have used it once this year, but he can almost climb over the side so it is time for it to go! :) For $70 (that is which the extension piece) it was well worth it.  I probably would have paid more. 

Yesterday we were all set to go to Walters house, one of Zares friends. Granted, they don't always play together, usually zare starts well and then slips away to play with Walters buckets of trucks. Walter will then start zipping around the house, coming back to report to us what each of his 3 brother and my younger son are doing.

"Hey Walter, Wheres Zare?"

"I don't know"

"Maybe you should check your room?"

This happens every time we are there, but zare has gotten better. When we were getting ready to go he announced; "we will all be scorpions. we will have a scorpion parade. the poison will be fruit. fruit will be spraying over the parade"

I was very interested in seeing how this will turn out, when the phone rang.

"Hello!"

"Kris! You are home! I need your help!"

My friend Steph, had just pinch hit for me last weekend, when my husband had to work, I had stuff to do. Today she had her husband working late, and appointment to go to. So you know, people help people. It would be a lonely selfish world without the care for others, but when you have a fun day planned, it stinks.

"come on over"

"Thank you! I am going to cry! I am leaving right now!"

Then I have the wonderful task of telling Zare, that we wont see Walter today, but Justin and Ryan are coming over. Then I call walters mom, as I am talking to her and explaining, apologizing. Zare is stomping the life out of a tank. I get off the phone and we chat.

"I want to make Justin and Ryan cry."

"no, you do not need to hurt them, they are your friends, and their mommy needs our help"

I let him pick an activity that he can do until they come, which is filling the sink with water and watching the dishes float.

It turns out well the boys have a good time, but then at 6pm Zare remembers something.  read more »

She's still suspended without pay until November, but when she returns to the classroom, she'll come back with tenure.

Portillo has been a teacher in St. Lucie County for 12 years.

It was a little more than a year ago that Portillo had 5-year old Alex Barton in her Kindergarten class at Morningside Elementary School.

Alex had apparently been acting up.  Portillo had the other students take a vote and they decided to send Alex out of the room.

The incident gained worldwide attention.  Alex was in the process of being diagnosed with a form of autism called Asperger's Syndrome.

St. Lucie County Schools Superintendent Michael Lannon recommended Portillo be suspended without pay for a year and be placed on an annual contract when she returned.

An administrative judge upheld the recommendation.

Portillo appealed the decision to the school board Wednesday and they voted to let her keep her tenure.

A dozen supporters spoke on her behalf.

Portillo would not talk about that day at Morningside, telling Newschannel 5, "It's done. I'm looking forward, I'm going forward."

Barton's mother, Melissa, is still planning to sue the school district.

As for the board's decision, Barton says, "I'm disgusted quite frankly and I think this sends a message to parents like myself of special needs children that our children are not safe in St. Lucie County and anything can happen."  read more »

I discovered early on that Gaven needed a lot of sensory input. I have gotten him on task using a sand timer. He uses it for everything. The school started also using it. He is often calmed by fiber optics. I use it sometimes as a "prize" to get chores done. He often throws his body to the ground and at first I thought he was just being silly but I am told that he is doing this for body stimulation. So I bought him a bean bag chair for him to safely throw himself onto. He responded well to this and the school has implemented this in his sensory time.  I would love to hear anymore great ideas from others that they have tried things that work.  

I came upon this when I was doing research and thought maybe I could benefit from speaking to others and listening. My son was diagnosed with autism when he was almost 4. I was shocked. It never occured to me that he could have autism because I did not know what it was. I felt entirely alone. Still do sometimes. My son is often unruly and is the main focus of most of our decisions. Family outings have to be planned around his comfort level which greatly affects our daughter who misses out on many fun activites because it is just too hard to take them both to things she likes. It has made her angry on many occasions and we try to have special days with just her but leaving my son with anyone but my mother makes me panic. He is sweet and kind and also cannot tell me when others are being mean to him because in his world cruelty is not understood. I actually caught a former babysitter locking him in his room. From this incident my sons father and I had to split our shifts and work opposite each other so he would never need daycare again but it has affected us. We have no time but weekends for each other. We are happy to do this to keep our son safe but we miss each other. Since I am alone with him much longer than his father I have more control over schedules and have become obsessed with making him adhere to things that make my life easier. His needs and wants have become my universe. None of my family members can even fathom what I go through every single day. They love him but they get impatient with his behavior which makes me not want to do as much with them. I still try because I think it is important for my son to know family and learn from them. I find it hard to be friendly with people because I do not want to see the look on their face when my son starts to annoy them. I have learned to seek out this look now to avoid everyone being angry with him.  read more »

LOL i remember just now why i titled the first blog fingers. So here goes. My boy was playing on a dolly while I was in the shower and crushed his fingers. He like many other children with autism feels very little intense pain. I hear SCREAMING, SCREAMING from him so i run out of the shower to find him holding his fingers and wailing. I look at the fingers and they are already purple. Call my hubby to come home take him to DR cause I have meeting and he comes home i leave and HE TAKES HIM TO SCHOOL! OMG i was livid, so mad at him. He told me he calmed down so he thought he was fine. So i get home from work take him to ER and they xray. The kid BROKE HIS FINGERTIPS!! Fingertips? wow? the DRs were so excited cause its a really unusual break so they're in there taking pictures and I'm trying to be chill cause if I'm not hes not. But anyway long story short, boy had cast for 4 weeks cover his whole arm and hand, got if off Monday and my boy looks at me and says "Ok mom you can cut my fingernails now, my fingertips are glued!" The doctor looked at him and said "yep your fixed!" and my son looked up at this stranger who was so kind to him he touched his face and said "I'm special, will you be my freind?" OMG the cast guy was crying me too and the guy gave him his email address and my son carries that card with him everywhere!! I see growth everyday and was beyond encouraged by him, reaching out and filling a void. "he'll never bee really good at social interactions" the doctotrs said. AND AGAIN HE PROVES THEM WRONG. LIMITS ARE THINGS WE GIVE OURSELVES, I'M SO GLAD THAT MY BOY HAS NO LIMITS, THAT HE DOENS'T GIVE HIMSELF ANY!!

So this site has definitely been a God send and I am reaching out again.  I hope all of you don't tire of me! :) My house many times is like controlled caos.  Just teetering on the edge of insanity.  I know part of the reason that my CJ boy is running the show is because we let him.  I need to make it more structured and organized for him, but I am at a loss on what to do first.  Can anyone out there help and tell me ideas on how to organize his bedroom and other things?  Thanks so much

Michael did it!  He slept from 9:50pm straight thru till 7:15 this morning.  No confusion arousal episode, no wandering about the house, no swing, he just peacefully slept. 

Vacation was good, but the boys treated like an obstacle course to get thru as fast as possible instead of something to stop and enjoy. We did have a good time, but it was a vacation on fast forward.

We drove up to Chicago, arriving about 11:30. We went to the Field Museum. We had a good drive up there. We stopped 3 times to get out and potty and play for a few minutes. They all did really well and we made good time. We didn't run into construction or problems with the vehicle or anything. We went thru the entire Field Museum in 2 1/2 hours. I have great pictures, but no clear idea of what was in the museum without looking at them. This is one place it might have been better to go without the monkeys.  We went up Lake Shore Dr and stopped to look at Lake Michigan and some landmarks like a fountain and sculptures. We headed out to the hotel and had to drive about 45 minutes to an hour to get there as we were leaving downtown around 3. What was I thinking? I had driven thru downtown, up and down Michigan Ave as my neice who was with me, had never seen Chicago.

My sister called while we were downtown and said that she had had to take her granddaughter to St. Louis because she woke up peeing blood. She didn't want us to cut the vacation short. She just was letting her daughter know where she was and that she hoped to be home by the time we were. That girl is a very sick little girl and has been for a long time. 

We checked in and shortly after, went in search of supper. That was the bad part, we actually had gotten a hotel that was not surrounded by restaurants. The kids counted airplanes while we looked for food. It was ok. They were very patient. 

We all went swimming after going back to the room. Twice. I sometimes wonder if I could just get the kids a room with a pool and they would be completely happy with just that. I have a pool at home, so what is the difference? I don't know.   read more »

I want to thank everyone that read my daughters poem. She really was thrilled to see that people on the web liked what she had to say. Now she wants to write more blogs. She was also told that she could possibly have her poem published. I would once again like to thank all that  commented and would appreciate more people commenting for her.

1. Remember that this task can be difficult at times due to sensory challenges
    which can make holding a writing instrument difficult.

2. Try your best to use the proper development sequence for writing skills.

3. Use most to least prompts (ex. Hand over hand assistance to help to always get
     it correct, then gradually reduce the assistance, as your child writes better.)

 read more »

Quirky, Yes—Hopeless, No: Practical Tips to Help Your Child with Asperger’s Syndrome Be More Socially Accepted Cynthia La Brie Norall with Beth Wagner Brust. St. Martin’s/Griffin, $16.95 paper (384p) ISBN 978-0-312-55849-9

Women who tend to teens, young adults with autism at home display unusually low levels of critical stress hormone 

PARK CITY, Utah — Mothers with teenagers or young adults living at home face plenty of stress. If the young home-dwellers have been diagnosed with autism, the emotional intensity of caregiving surges dramatically in the mothers and may undermine the functioning of a critical stress hormone, a long-term study suggests.

Over a five-year span, women who had children with autism living at home reported many more challenges in their daily lives than women caring for typically developing teens and young adults, reported psychologist Marsha Seltzer of the University of Wisconsin–Madison on June 4 at the annual meeting of the Jean Piaget Society. Moms of children with autism spent nearly all of their time on caregiving activities, experienced an inordinate amount of daily fatigue, often got into arguments at home and at work, and reported having negative feelings far more often than positive ones.

Analyses of saliva samples collected from women near the end of the study period showed that those caring for offspring with autism produced unusually low levels of the stress hormone cortisol throughout the day. In mothers caring for teenage or young adult children free of developmental problems, cortisol levels rose sharply throughout the morning and then declined to a level that still remained well above that of mothers tending to kids with autism.

“We’re seeing remarkably low levels of cortisol activation in mothers caring for their children with autism, which may reflect the toll taken by chronic stress and fatigue in their lives,” Seltzer said.

For the full story, go to the link and listen to the audio. 

A panel of medical experts for the federal Food and Drug Administration is being asked to approve three powerful and expensive antipsychotic drugs for use in children. The FDA panel begins a two-day meeting outside Washington on Tuesday and is scheduled to vote Wednesday on whether to approve the drugs.

The hearing and the vote highlight growing use of these drugs by children, even as questions remain about their side effects.

The medications — Seroquel, Zyprexa and Geodon — are already approved for adults. Many doctors and parents say they can also be life-changing for children and adolescents with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. Doctors already prescribe them to kids, even without FDA approval.

A Daughter's Milestone

Some pointers for conducting lessons:

 read more »

my 3 1/2 year old son awoke last night screaming and fighting, about 1 am it was awful.

he was hitting and screaming but he isn't verabal enough to tell us what was wrong.

we could't calm him down for about an hour and then he was up for the rest of the night.

It broke my heart, i have never felt so helpless in my life...
has anyone else ever had this happen?

I got a call today at 11:00am,this morning.From William O'Connor School in Brooklyn,saying that theres an opening space in september , and my son Hezekiah has been accpected.William O'Connor school has never really said there's no more opening space,"just that his name will be put down  on the waiting list,but please  mom make sure you take  a look at other schools".From  then on i have called  William O'Connor schol everyday,even on a holiday just to live a message. My son Hezekiah has been on the waiting list from March its now June,3months later and I can"t even begin to tell you how happy i truely am.I have been stress out for months calling 14 schools in total ,an they all saying "sorry there's no more opening space.,good luck to you and your family.Now just to know that the school which i always wanted Hezekiah to be in has accpected him.I feel so GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Middletown Centre for Autism Quarterly Research Bulletin

It also seems the Middletown Centre for Autism staff are not computer literate otherwise the bulletin would have been linked on their one-page website. Considering they have wasted seven million pounds, it might be prudent to find ways to save money on postage costs.

I wish my friends hadn't bothered showing me this piece of trash. There are so many other pressing issues to cover than this, but after reading the A5 (4page) piece of disappointing irrelevance, I had to comment.

The 'bulletin' is prefaced with a letter from the CEO of Middletown, Mr Gary Cooper, thanking those who contributed to the content (the monkeys at Belfast Zoo were chuffed).

The remaining 3 pages of the photocopied 'bulletin' contain 5 abstracts. Four of these are from the same journal and same volume of that journal (Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, Volume 39. )  read more »

PLEASE HELP!!!  My son has never never never received ABA and everywhere I turn, either the therapists are booked or we are on a waiting list.  I live somewhere very rural.  My son is slowly creeping up the path to four years old and I am afraid of losing him to this disorder because I didn't do enough.  Does anyone know of books, tapes, etc...that I could possibly get my hands on that I could teach myself the ABA method?  Or if there are any other resources for this type of therapy?  Anything will be appreciated. 

Today was Zares last day of PT for the school year.  With preschool ending soon it gets me thinking about summer. We don't qualify for extended school year or ESY. Last year we spent way too much on summer camps, which Zare enjoyed (except for drama camp). This year we do not have as much funds. So I have been checking the christian radio website for a listing of VBS camps. So far they are not in my area or they are at night. Who ever heard of a 6pm VBS? I guess for parents that work, I dunno. So, My mom signed up the boys at her church VBS. That leaves still a lot of time left in July. My sister comes in August with her daughter, who loves to tell Zare how to play. Me the hyper planner that I am, am a little peeved that I have not found enough for July when it is ONE MONTH AWAY. I may be overly stressing, but a bored zare does not do well, things get shredded, entire rolls of toilet paper get bathed, all spray bottles get emptied onto walls, etc. I am just doing pre-damage maintenance control!

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 This poem was written by my 14 year old daughter  read more »

Tomorrow we begin the process for the sleep study program.  I did the phone interview part today.  I had a good feeling, good vibe about the woman who asked me a thousand or more questions about the twins.  We have a two and half hour parent meeting tomorrow afternooon, discussing both kids sleeping issues.  They will then start their sleeping plan program on Michael.  He goes first because of the night terror issue.  The doc is hoping that once we start the stuff they design for him, that we can use it with Kaylee and then not have to do a whole program for her too.  We shall see.  I am excited also that Mickey's mom, Sherri(Nana) will get to see the OT in action.  She is watching the kids with Liana, my teen daughter so Mickey and I can both go tomorrow to the meeting.  Sherri is excited too because she is really trying to learn what she can do to help the twins, thus helping me.  Plus, I get out of the house with no kids!  I am so grateful that they are affiliated with a local hospital so medicaid is paying for this.  I am of course fully aware that like the melatonin dream, it just may not pan out and work.  So, I am hopeful, but not sitting around in the clouds expecting a miracle. 

My husband finally convinced me to go with him and the kids camping. Being from New York I did not find the word camping pleasant to say the least. The thought of bugs and sleeping on the floor just doesn't seem fun or adventerous to me. Anyway, I agreed and so my husband told me he would take it easy on me and take me to a place where camping would be very easy. I felt that taking 7 children camping, 3 of them under the age of 4 is not fun. To make a long story short I went. We went for the weekend and at first I was very apprehensive. My husband took me to a place called Spruce Run it's in New Jersey. It is a great place to take the kids, I was very pleased. Our tent was next to the restrooms and showers, and the workers cleaned the facilities every couple of hours. So the bathrooms were always clean. We were also next to a playground and the babies loved this fact. Across from us was the water and if you wanted you could rent a boat or just go fishing. I was worried that Izzy wasn't going to like it and I was concerned about how he was going to act. You never know what to expect with kids but kids with Autism its always a guessing game. He loved it. The ability to run around,  sit in front of the fire,  and the fact that you park yor car right where you camp helped him because I told him if he really got scared he could sleep in the car. He never even asked once we got there it was like he was a different person. Now that we are home Izzy actually sleeps through the night and doesn't drink a bottle anymore. I think it was worth it and I think everyone should try to campout at least once.

I gave a workshop recently where one of the participants asked a really important question.  “What are social skills?”  That question promoted some discussion that demonstrated we don’t all have the same ideas about the social skill needs and challenges of our students. One attendee suggested teaching social skills meant focusing on teaching conversation skills.  Others shared a broader view. 

What ARE Social Skills?

Learning social skills is challenging for students with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD).  Social skills are identified as a prime area for educational intervention.  But what are social skills?    Before determining HOW to teach, it is critical to decide WHAT to teach.  What areas need to be considered?     read more »

Hello my name is Julie. I'm new to this blog and I'm a single parent of a 3 year old with Autism. My child has PDD, he was diagnosed when he was 17 months. He's started getting early intervention a month after he was diagnosed and has made such an improvement. His eye contact is better, he likes to play with other children, he knows emotion, he doesn't speak yet but he says a few words. He still does have behavior issues and still has a low attention span but therapists and I are working on that with him. Another thing is that my son is very sensory especially with his mouth. He can't tolerate textures, so he still eats baby food. It can be frustrating sometimes  to see him not eat regular food but I know eventually he will. I believe everything is a process, with help and patience these children will get better.

My son Hezekiah is 3yrs old.We started potty training,at school they take him to the potty every 30mins.So i try my very best to take him every 30mins at home.But that have"t been working out so well,by the time   we get him  to the potty he have already done an accident in his dapers.Hezekiah is autistic (PDD),he just become  Verbal   primarily using "one word" sentences (ex)" rather then saying I want milk mummy ,Hezekiah would only say milk"! Just wanted to know if anyone else  have a different idea on  how to go about potty training Hezekiah?

I always have been. Either way, I'm writing this as I wonder if I am the only one.

 From time to time when my friends, and even boyfriend, brag about how their children are the smartest, their children's new accomplishments, etc. I get upset. Sometimes sad, sometimes annoyed. Usually it ends in me picturing their precious baby girls growing up to be foul mouthed rebellious tramps, or their genius sons experimenting with drugs and living in a roach infested $500 a month apartment.  Okay, okay, not usually that extreme. Mainly just coming home late drunk, shouting "I hate you" at their parents. I smile because I know the chances of my son indulging in such typical teenage behavior are slim to none. He will still probably be showing me the coolest parts of his favorite cars. He may never even say "I love you" let alone "I hate you."

To myself, these thoughts seem pretty derranged, but I also feel like they are thoughts some people may experience but never admit. I am more open than most.

I'm thinking new friends may be in order anyway. I was recently frustrated because my friends neglected to invite Rhett to a picnic for all of their children. In addition to that they sneak in "retard" jokes about Rhett whenever they can. "Rhett stands for Rhettarded" etc.

I duno. Thoughts?

I wanted to share this pic with all you Paul Walker fans. See the guy far right, next to the gal in orange? That is Rhett Walker, Pauls uncle. Rhett is my age. This was taken at a birthday party recently. Anna Webberly the gal in orange posted it on Facebook. Rhett was HOT and still is damn good lookin. Look at that WALKER smile =)

Am I the only one that gets a kick out of seeing how many times something I've posted has been read lol? I posted when Jett Travolta passed WAY before his time and its been read 5,688 times. I dont know why but I get a charge out of seeing how many times its been read. Please tell me Im not the only one who thinks this way lol.

I just wanted to welcome our newbies =) My name is Cindy. I live in Texas. My son Marcel is 9, severly autistic, non verbal, severe retardation and he has seizures. This site helps me keep my sanity. Alota nice people here with good ideas and support. Enjoy =) We understand what you're going through.

I posted a few links today.  I've got a ton that I could add to that area.  Give me time!

Hey Autism Blogger - Glad to be here!

Thank you for your hard work on this blog.  We would like to share our video with you.

Linda

We lost another mattress today. Issac tore off the cover and foam and whatever that filler stuff is, it looks like pad for carpet or something. He took off the sheet, but did not tear it.

Good news! I found a seamstress who is willing to make a mattress cover from the Carhart material. I told her my idea to enclose the mattress in a vinyl cover which is then covered with a Carhart mattress cover which has a tough zipper (think heavy heavy coat) in one end. This zipper is then padlocked to the end to stay closed. I asked her to attach a ring to the material where the end of the zipper where is closes. That way I can ensure he will not just unzip it. She's game to try all this and thinks it can be done. If the Carhart material does not work we are going to talk to the tarp factory about 45 minutes away. I don't know that there is a tougher material that is available to us.

By the way, she will also make the blanket out of Carhart too. I just have to go get the material. I think she can start on them in about a week. She has 3 weddings to finish by Friday so it is not going to be this week. I think a week is good. Surely we can hold out that long. Everybody cross your fingers!!!!!

Today was the Spring Festival in our town...I decided to go with Seth because they had some of those bouncing things kids go in and games, baked goods, face painting, ect.   Mark, my husband thought he would like it...WRONG.  As soon as we got there he cringed... I saw the look... Yup... MELTDOWN coming on.  He said people are watching me...I quietly said "they will if you throw yourself on the ground but if you don't... they won't look at you".  Guess what? NO MELTDOWN I was so proud of him..we didn't stay long because I could see he was stressed but he dealt with it which is a MAJOR accomplishment.  We stopped by a few thrift stores and he was fine but when I said "let's go home" he was ready.  I am ready for the stress of today to come out in some way with him...perhaps with my eggs Ha Ha  But once again I am ready with white eggs and not the brown, cage free ones!  LOL

Today I was a mama bear.  I am sick and tired of Grampa Mick telling me that I just some bored housewife who gave her twin autism so I have a hobby.  He says this all the time.  He gives them food they can't have, ice cream especially.  He knows they are not to have it, and he blatantly disregards my wishes and gives them it and other naughty foods when the twins are at his house.  Mickey just lets him.  Grampa has stayed away from our home for 6 months, won't come in from the last incident where I had to tell him he had to listen and stop this behavior.  I told him off, he says so he is not welcome in my home...nonsense.  I am polite as can be, every time, but no more.  He walked in the door and gave them fudgesicles while I was in the back bedroom trying to calm down a teething, screaming Alex.  He just ignored Mickey telling him they couldn't have the darn things and gave them to the twins anyway.  I came out just in time to hear them both screaming at the freezer door wanting more.  There was chocolate and icecream all over them and my floors.  The men, just laughing it up about the mess.  I handed Alex to Mickey and tore that man a new you know what.  I told him to take his poisionous popsicles and find the door.  He won't be back and now I can not trust him even more.  He did it right in their own home, with me around the corner.  His ignorance, his disrespect and unwillingless to help and not hinder and ridicule befuddles me.  He turned around as the door slammed and told Mickey that I was you know screwing these kids up with this autism bull****.  "She needs a job so she ain't so bored.  She used to be so nice till she started this autism cr**."  I suffice it to say that I am nice, I am nice until it is time to not be so nice.  This one's for you, Cindy!

Well, the sleeping bag did survive, but only because I heard him starting to tear it and ran and rescued it. It was made of the slick material and yes, he did like it very much, he carries it around like a cloak for a while, but then he sat down on his bed and started to tear it. I guess that's a no, it didn't work. I will fix the part he tore and then we are back to square one. I covered him up last night after he fell asleep.

Big brother came home, they will probably be glad to see him today. They usually don't acknowledge someone for a few hours and he didn't get home til 8. Glad to have him home tho.

It has been a quiet couple of days. I had to run the kids to their father's and back as his car broke down. He doesn't have the credit to get a good car so he is dealing with clunkers and well, they don't last long as he puts about 1000 miles a week on them. I am tired of running. And we are supposed to go on vaca next week. This is not the way to start it. I hope to gain more umph before the beginning of the week.

The Superman Celebration is the end of next week and we try to go down for that. We have never been, but the town it is held in Metropolis is close to the place we go hiking. We usually run down and go hiking a couple of times a summer, sometimes more.

Well, today is Seth's birthday so we are going to start celebrating early it seems. 

Just wanted to share this with others.  Kaylee is a "w" sitter and Alex is doing it a lot too lately.  He is not walking yet, so I think he does it for balance as well.  Kaylee is going to recieve physical therapy at school.  Yesterday we DT pointed out that she is doing it a lot, and it is not good for kids to sit like this, especially when they are already delayed.  It is hard to stay on her about it, because I didn't know it was bad for kids at all until yesterday.  Kaylee has done it forever.  I just thought she was flexible, cool!  Now we have yet another habit to work on breaking around here.  She hates me telling her to fix her legs and then fixing them for her.   Just wanted to share the link so if others see their kids sitting in this position.  http://www.goodshepherdnurseryschool.org/w-sitting.htm

Caden's sense of humor streak has continued this week.  Last night he decided that daddy was "Caden", that he was "daddy" and that I was to remain in mommy role.  He told my husband to brush his teeth and get into "Caden's bed" and that he was going to sleep with me because he was "daddy."  He then got into our bed, on "daddy's side" and started making snoring sounds.  When my husband came into our room to get Caden, he told my husband "Go back to bed, Caden, you are not supposed to be out of bed."  I am loving his humor!  When the road gets rough, I hope to look back on this moment and remember the light he often brings to my sometimes darkened heart.

I find it very interesting that it also seems like Kaylee and Michael are swapping behaviors out.  Michael did the lining up and had little appetite. He made patters with everything all over the place.   Kaylee had more appetite, more food choices she would eat, and hoarded(i do not know if I am spelling this word right  sorry) toys and repetive rote counting.  Now Michael eats more food choices and is hoarding and rote counting.  Kaylee has the poor appetite and she is lining up everything she can get her hands us, making patterns of objects, toys and cards all over my tables and floor.  She still hoardes a little, but doesn't have big meltdowns about it like Michael is.  It is almost like they have switched behaviors on me.  I just wanted to get this down with a date on it so if they swap on me again I have a date to refer back to in effort to keep track of this interesting event.

Hi all,

I'm new here and new to having a child with autism, not new to autism itself however. I have four children, two of my own, beautiful boys 6 (autism & sevant) 9 (brillant sweet kind boy), and two that are mine but not bio chillins 14 (girl, hawaiin neice and OMG!! My cheerleader!) and step-son (18 and ohhhhhMG!!My footbal star). Naw they are good kids, but anyhoos. LOL I've lost my train of thought. I guess just for now a HI is in order and more to come later, have a meltdown occuring g2g

BYE

I am new to this site and new to this subject. My 6 yr. old son Joey was just diaganosed with PDD-NOS after years of misdiagnosis and a very frustrating (and lonely) year in kindergarten. We had been told over the years that our son might be "a little bit autistic" but it wasn't until this year that we finally had the proper testing done. We were in denial for a while, since he does not fit the typcial description of ASD. He is very affectionate, loves to give complements and spoke at an early age. It was clear from the very start that there was something not quite right, but no matter how many doctors we visited, none could tell us what was wrong. At this point most of his behavior problems have disappeared, and he is pretty fun to be around. School has been a bit of a challange, with attention problems and social issues. The girls in his class tend to baby him and the boys don't want anything to do with him at all. It has been painful to watch him struggle in the classroom and on the playground. My heart breaks for him when I see him realize that he has been excluded or when some of the boys bully him. I am searching for a better placement for him next year, although the options are limited. Seems like the choices toggle between a large integrated classroom to the other extreme of a small closed class with 2 or 3 students. I am torn, because it seems to me that he would be better served in a smaller class (10 or 12) but I am worried that an extremely small class of only 2 or 3 might not give him enough opportunity to learn the social skills he is most definately lacking. If anyone has thoughts on this subject please advise.

Mickey and I had a suggestion made to us by one of the twins' therapists where Alex, our 1 year old is concerned.  Sally mentioned changing the schedule kids are typically on for his immunizations, just as a precation, like how we do not give him cows milk and do a lot of gluten free foods for him, like just in case.  Have any of you done this with a non autistic baby after having older autistic sibling?  What do you all think about  us going to the peditrcian with this on his 1 year checkup, when he is due for more shots, of course.  It makes sense to me, like it can not hurt him.  I know it means getting shots more often, like the MMR is then three separtarate shots, three weeks in a row, but it's a quick nurse visit and may just be wise on our part.  I would love to hear what others have to say on this issue.  Bring it on!

Will someone please explain why it is that caffeine has a calming effect on Michael whereas Kaylee gets hyper on it?  Nights when I let Michael have soda he sleeps better.  Nights when Kaylee has had soda, she wakes up more often in the night, walking around, chattering.  I am guessing this is probably like anything else, because each of these kids is different.  But, I do not get why caffeine helps Michael to relax and concentrate better.  I have played around with it, let him have it during the day, not let him have any all day, and the days he gets the Dr. Pepper he so loves, he actually is less restless at night.  He is quieter too, not so much verbal stemming  going on.  When Kaylee gets the Coke she likes, she is up and down all night, even on the melatonin.  It is utterly fascinating to note their uniqueness in every area.  Anyway, I would love to have some insight into this subject. 

The bigger little brother gets the harder it is for Zare to share the bath. I was standing outside the bathroom chatting on the phone with my sis (the bathroom is small loud and splashy on bath nights). Then of course there is a screech from little brother. Zare has bitten him, again. "Zare don't bite your brother!" I shout. My sister, who is a SPL in SoCal, chimes in "Biting your brother at 5 is not okay behavior, thats wierd." Thanks sis, did you figure that out all by yourself? I am the younger sister so sometimes she teaches me things I ALREADY KNOW. Anyway, I think I am going to have to do "naked time out." because nothing else is working. The only other options is two baths, and I am not ready for that.

I sent my oldest son off camping with Grandpa yesterday and it was hard to see him go. He goes every year, but we still miss him. He hasn't hit his "too cool to be seen with Mom" stage yet so we still spend a lot of time together. My daughter is really missing him because they spend a lot of time together swimming and playing PS2 or what not.

My plans for going to Chicago to see the Field Museum and Adler Planetarium are falling thru. I am so irritated. I asked 3 different people about going. I even changed my days to make it better for them and now they have an excuse of why they cannot go.  The first person I am not irritated with because she is having heart problems, she started having chest pains and found out thru tests that the lower 3rd of her heart is not working. How can I be mad at that? I just want her to get it taken care of.  The second person is being recruited to take care of her neice. I understand, but I can't take the neice or I would. I just don't think that one more person with me, without the extra help is actually going to help. The third person just acts like she doesn't want to go. She has no excuse, just ask someone else. She is the one I am irritated with. I mean, I have it all planned out and now, what am I supposed to do? I seriously don't think I am going to be able to swing this alone. I even asked the kid's father if he wanted to go and he said he couldn't take off work. He works for himself, he's facing prison in a week, and his car just broke down.... I think it is a sign, don't you? He talked to his parents about us stopping by while we were up there, because his parents live in the Chicago burbs and they said I could drop the kids off. I'm sorry, that's not helpful, and I don't trust them enough to do that. They are ill equiped to deal with the twins. By the way, my kids' father doesn't trust them to take care of them either. What does that say?  read more »

Well, there's one very difficult behaviour that my brother is showing, and it's been going on for quite a while and heavens knows we've tried all kinds of things to make it fade away but nothing seems to work!

Basically, whenever we call out to my brother, ask him to do something, or if he gets upset or excited, he'll reach out, grab our clothes by the collar and pull. And he doesn't let go. We can somehow handle it at home, but when we're in public, he either grabs my Mom's or my collar, and pulls and gives the whole world a free show of our bras! (I've however, advised my Mom to wear nice, lacy, and sexy bras when we go out and I do the same, so that even if he pulls at our clothes, at least people get to see something nice... yup, we try to find humour in our situation, or else we'd be depressed about it all the time, wouldn't we? :D)

His teachers have taught him certain commands like 'Hands off', and saying it calmy and firmly and he seems to listen to them...but never when it comes to me and Mom!

If anyone else has the same problem ... any other ideas???

My name is Ms.Alfred.I have an amazing 2yr old son,who was diagnose October of 2008,with (PDD).A year ago toe walking,hand flapping,an constantly humming every second of the day,was all we saw an heard nothing else.He got evaluated an entered a great school called Challenge Early Intervention Center.He now receives speech at home an at  the center,an ABA 5xs a week at home.After a year an a half i can honestly say that he is now able to point an use one -word phrases in order to identify his needs an wants  .When ever  I am ask in a few words describe your son " I say his an Amazing,Energetic,Warm,Intelligent,Loving,Child who is ALWAYS moving around not wanting to sit for a long period of time, unless he finds something really interesting. He loves Puzzles,Letters,Numbers,Colors,Shapes,Music ,an the Outdoors.When I join this Support Group ,i read  an article  where a Mom best describes having an autistic child.She said"Having an autistic child,is like planning a trip to Rome but ending up in Amsterdam.Neither is better or worse,European cities they're just different.They both are  great and offer a lot to enjoy an learn from". After reading that article it made me not want to give up,but rather push to have my son Accomplish every an anything he might wanna do in the future .  read more »

yesterday I got a ball. That night my son zare played catch with Dad. When he got tired they found a playground ball (we had a ball? amazing!) for kicking. They played in the sloped part of the driveway, with zare on the bottom so the ball always rolled back to him. They played for a half an hour. I was proud of my husband because he always wants to start correcting zare right away. Hello? He has to enjoy it first so he will want to do it again? So however that ball got to my husband was okay, and that was the best part.

A couple days ago a kitten wandered into our yard and my son instantly fell in love with it. He carried it all over the place and named it WOO MOO.  Yesterday it was hot so I filled a large storage container with water so he could play in it... everything was fine so I stepped inside the house and heard him laughing. I came back out to find he was holding the kitten down in the water. He was laughing because it was crying... I ran and scooped it up, wrapped it up tightly and held it close to me all the while telling him that it was not good.  The kitten was in shock and thankfully the course in animal science came in handy so I knew what to do.  About an hour later the kitten was okay and I hope that my repeating over and over about what would have happened to the kitten sunk into Seth's head.  I am trying to find humor but sometimes it's hard.  As smart as he is; there is little common sense in that little egg of his.  Anyway, he remembered what I said this morning so hopefully it won't happen again.  Hope everyone had a good day today!

I am extremely frustrated.  I don't know what's wrong with LJ today.  Is it because we were a little out of order this morning?  We ate round sausage instead of links (JD needs protein for his low HGH)?  Most of the time I know why we are out of whack - lack of sleep, didn't get what he wanted, etc.  Our morning wasn't THAT unusual from the norm.  He's been doing really, really well the last month or so.  Maybe it was going to therapy for the 3rd time this week.  He had his speech eval on Monday, then OT on Tuesday and social skills this morning.  Too much?  His speech eval was pretty exhausting for him.  He just starts shutting down if you start challenging that brain too much or ask him to engage on your terms for too long.  I've spent all afternoon working on getting him to take a nap so hopefully he'll feel better, but no can do.  I need a break too!  I only end up more frustrated because I've dealt with him during the only time my other 2 kids are asleep. 

Lately, the kids have not been getting to bed till almost 9pm too.  My DH is getting home late (I dearly love him, but that's a whole other vent), it's still light outside, they need baths....it just depends on the day on what delays it, but it is burning me out on both ends.  I either stay up late to get "me" time & end up overtired, or go to bed frustrated at everyone.  I spent the first few minutes this morning asking God to help me minister to my family better, but it seems I need more grace.   read more »

(AP) — CHICAGO - An antidepressant that is among the most popular kinds of medicine used for treating autism didn't work for most kids and caused nightmares and other side effects, new research found.

Results showed risks with Celexa outweighed any benefits in the largest published study of medication versus dummy pills for autism. That's according to the lead author, Dr. Bryan King, director of child and adolescent psychiatry at Seattle Children's Hospital and the University of Washington medical school.

The drug is not approved for treating autism. However, many doctors have prescribed it, thinking it might help prevent repetitive behaviors such as spinning, twirling and head-banging that are hallmark autism symptoms. Similar antidepressants have been shown to help treat repetitive actions in people with obsessive-compulsive disorder.

But in the autism study, Celexa worked no better than dummy pills. In fact, compared with kids on placebo, those on Celexa were more than twice as likely to develop repetitive behaviors, as well as other side effects including sleep problems and hyperactivity.

Two things have been driving me crazy lately.

1) I don't know anyone in any similar situation to mine in real life. Rhett has never met another special needs child.

2) My friends seem to exclude Rhett from the activities of their same aged children; ie: The picnic that virtually everyone I know went to and didn't bother to mention to me, because they though we "wouldn't be interested."

Rhett's specialist tells me that although there is not a lot of autism in our town, there is some.

The obvious solution seems to be for me to reach out via facebook group. I'd like to start something where those who have been touched by autism, and mainly autistic children, can all get together and have picnics, trips to places, play dates, etc. Maybe eventually even fundraising efforts for Autism Awareness in general or for more costly trips for families with low income. To help with the expense of special diets? Whatever. I see endless possibilities.

I won't exclude the group to be stritcly in my town, but anyone who is willing to travel to the town. Does anyone know if these ideas generally work out? Can anyone think of a clever or catchy name for this group? Thank you!

My husband and I are not sporty people, we do not watch sports or do them. My husband use to do pick up volleyball in his bachelor days. We like to hike and walk and do things that are low risk. Zare's PT said he needs to have sports skills to be ready for recess. ok. First order of business, buy a ball. Yes, a five year old boy had zero balls in the house. It happens. Actually with 3 males in the house there ARE three pairs of balls but I was not counting them. The dog doesn't count because he is technically a gelding.

So the PT recommend a squishy ball, easy to catch. Today at the store we see a big bright pink squishy ball with rubber hair. "I love it!" zare says. We bring it home. Husband is home when we come home. "Say." says Husband "thats a great ball, we can play catch with it later!"

"no, thats too hard" says zare, squishing it, sitting on it, hugging the life out of it.

"hey zare, we bought it for squishing AND catching"

"oh, sorry" thats his automatic response whenever corrected, I haven't taught him other responses yet. Because its the only time he says sorry nicely.  Any-hoo, we shall see how actual catching goes.

The day started out normally enough. I was finishing up my quiet weekend by getting ready for the kids to return. I swept the house, picked up books, etc. I changed my oil and after having to borrow my Dad's filter wrench, I got it done. No problems. I had to go get a T-post and prop up the tree that Issac decided he didn't like in the front yard. He tore the bark and a big piece of the tree out on Friday. It was still alive, but as half of it's trunk was missing it couldn't support it's own weight. I tied it to the T-post, and provided that Issac doesn't pay any attention to it for while, it might make it. I did the dishes, I started laundry, and I aired up the pool ring on my pool. I am annoyed that I cannot find the hole in it. I spent about 30 minutes looking and then the monkeys were home.

Their father said nothing about their weekend which is typical and complained about not having any gas money (also typical). His car broke down around 2:30 and he called me. He asked me if I knew anyone who had a cheap car he could buy. I said I wasn't even going to bother looking. It sounds rude, but think about this. He just told me he had no gas money so where is he going to get the money to buy a car? Even a cheap one? Also, knowing that he has a court date about 8 days away and word on the street is that he is getting time, why would I bother looking for something he isn't going to be around to use anyway? Ugh!  read more »

I was wondering if anyone has any stories or statistics on autism and blended families. Mainly I'm interested in knowing... if one couple had an autistic child and split up, if one of the parents went on to have children with someone else, does that reduce the chances of that child having autism?

Also, my son loved my boyfriend initially. He was someone we knew before his father and I split up, and even after we moved in together Rhett loved the boyfriend. He even called him "dada." Dada and mum are the only words Rhett uses and he rarely uses them. Actually, he does say "out" now, because he hates being in our apartment and always wants to go out.. I digress... Then his father moved away (deadbeat) and we moved to an apartment Rhett seems to hate. In the apartment Rhett screams at said boyfriend, won't let him touch him, bites him, etc. Seems to loathe him for no reason at all. The boyfriend is really great with him. ANYWAY, the interesting part is that Rhett is generally not like that with him when we are not in the apartment. It just seems to be here, or sometimes when we're out and he is tired or whatever. His interolerance can take its toll on our relationship. I was just wondering if anyone has heard of anything like this. 

We had a lot of therapy today.  Michael had two hours and Kaylee had one.  Michael had Developmental this morning and then they both had Occupational with Desi this afternoon.  I am astounded with the results Desi gets from my kids.  She is an independant therapists that First Steps hired.  She follows her own rules and she does the therapy with them rather than modeling it and leaving it to me to do like most First Steps therapists do.  Desi is a fabulous teacher.  She knows things about these kids that just blows my mind, and she read my kids very quickly and is right on target with everything she does.  No exaggerations, and by the way, I know I am really fortunate to have her working on my kids.  She has been doing therapy with the swing first.  Michael chews on his chewelry and they work on the words stop, go, swing, more.  Today he said all four of those words for her.  We had tears of frustration, wanting the reward of the swing moving, but the words came out.  She understood them, not just me, so that was exciting to watch.  Then she uses Michael's little invention, the tub bed and works with them for a 1/2 hour in the tub.  My little busy toddlers never tried to get out of the tub, they worked so hard on a shape puzzle for a 1/2 hour a piece in the tub.  Michael said some numbers for her and the word more again.  Kaylee was slapping and screaming with big tears popping out of her big blue eyes, but by lordy she would not say more for the next piece of the puzzle.  Then she let out a big ole scream and slaps  Desi on the arms a few times, sighed real big and came out with "I want more."  Desi gave her the next piece.  She did the scream, sigh and the whole sentence eight more times for each piece she wanted.    My Kaylee said a whole sentence!   And I did not flinch once while either kid cried.  I understood that it was what needed to happen for the work to produce results, and I stayed calm and even giggled with Desi  read more »

Okay here's the problem. Marcel is 9 years old, 4 fot 6, 105 pounds. He's outgrown his booster seat. When we buckle him in the top hits him at the shoulder. We can just by pass the clip at the top of the seat so it fits like a regular lap belt but that will only do for awhile longer. Are there booster seats for BIG kids? By law here in Tx he can just be strapped in normally but I dont feel safe doing that yet ugh.

My son has PDD-NOS officially, basically high-functioning ASD. My sister affectionately calls him "V8 boy" from those older commercials when everybody was walking slanted. Of course when he has a bad day its more like "Hello Diagnosis!" He is entering regular kindergarten next year, something that is both exciting and frightening at the same time. He also has low muscle tone (hypotonia), which is a lot better but still needs some work. But he loves life, loves to read, and to always be learning. Heaven to him would be a room full of different encyclopedias, activity books, and working engines.  What he hates to do is eat, at least being told to eat, or being told to do anything for that matter.

The main things we are focusing this summer are sport skills (my worst area) for the playground, knowing the difference between play fighting and real fighting, and not pooping in the underwear.

"zare? The bathroom is right next to you? Why did you not go?"

" I was busy."

so yeah, we are working on that!

I've been reading alot of blogs about destruction this past week.  I think it comes with the territory especially in BOYS.  When my son, Seth was 2 he found the HONEY... and proceeded to drizzle it all over the house.  My mom still jokes about it and since then I have tried to find the humor in these situations although this past week I have been through 4 tubes of toothpaste.  Fortunately it's been confined to the bathroom and his body.  My first response to such messes is OH SETH, WHY?  As he gets older he will give me some kind of answer... this one is "we need a Touch N Brush" Darn that AD!  Does anyone else's kids repeat Ads from TV?  I need to start charging these advertisers because he repeats them exactly like it is on the commercial.  Well, I still have my hair and trying to keep a sense of humor although he goes from one mess to another.  I truely feel sympathic to all who travel this road. After you clean it up... try laughing... it beats crying and makes you feel better somehow.  Hopefully we will keep it together!

I wrote this a long time back ... want to share it with people who understand!  read more »