I am often reminded of the lack of awareness some people have with their attitudes towards the behaviours and symptoms of autistic children and the relationship of these behaviours and symptoms to the style of ‘parenting’ they receive.  I’m sure most (if not all) parents with autistic children have at some point in time been on the receiving end of disapproving comments and 'tips' - often from people who have little understanding of autism, and no thought for the hurt that they cause the parents. I’ve spent the day pondering the whole ‘parenting and autism’ thing. Parenting style (or for that matter what some people consider ’lack of’ parenting) is simply not the cause of autism, and will in no way ‘bring on’ an autism spectrum disorder. Sadly though, an autism spectrum disorder (and the behaviours and challenges that an ASD brings with it) may cause many parents to question their ability to effectively parent (and unfortunately the parents’ questioning of their own attributes can be escalated by the attitudes of those around them). Even after a diagnosis, and when people are aware of a child’s autism spectrum disorder, many family members and friends will still link the child’s behaviours back to the parenting.  Speaking from personal experience, an autism spectrum disorder can place a great deal of strain on social relationships. An autistic child’s behaviour will often have to be continually explained to others, and a parent’s social interactions may be continually interupted and challenged. But for many parents, social contact may drop off not only because it all becomes too hard to manage the child’s needs in a social environment, but also because of the scrutiny that they come under in regard to their parenting skills. Parents often find themselves subject to criticism (whether it is intended as ‘well meaning’ or not) and sadly, a lack of understanding in regard to what they do and how they ‘manage’. One thing is for sure though, as a parent of an autistic child, not only do you have to master the typical parenting skills, but you also master the specialised skills.  Hopefully over time there will be a greater recognition of this... http://www.managingautism.com