It's hard to find presents for JohnPaul.  He's still a little kid mentally and emotionally.  Here he is. tall, dark, and hairy, must be at least 5 ft 10 inches tall, and he wishes he lived on the Island of Sodor!  (where Thomas the Tank Engine lives, for those of you who haven't been indoctrinated). 

But wait!  This year it's different.....he actually told us what he wants. 

He wants to shave.

Yikes.  Oh, double-yikes.  I have a flashback to when he was 6 and he found his sister's Bic razor in the shower, and he took off part of his lips.  We found him in the bathroom, bloody and triumphant.  Oh Shit-yikes.

Wait...hubby tells me that it's not a problem.  I stop hyperventilating, and revive.  We can get him an electric shaver.  Hooray!!   Hold it - he'll electrocute himself when he plays in the water in the sink!   AAuuugh!!!        Wait, says loyal husband, as he makes me breath into a paper bag.  We can get him a rechargable, battery-operated shaver.  Now no harm can come to the lad.  I'm back from the dead, once again.    Later on we present this idea to JohnPaul, just to see what his reaction is.  Just to make sure he hasn't changed his pubescent mind.  "So,"  we say, "wouldn't it be nice if Santa brought you a shaver for Christmas? hmmm?"  He thinks for a bit, and then he nods 'yes'.  "Oh good!" we say, "And you could shave yourself, like other teenagers do."         He thinks some more, then says, with great enthusiasum, and gesturing to body parts I will not mention here except to say that they're below the belt, "Yeah, I could get rid of all this hair that's growing everywhere!"  Oh my.  Now it's clear to us both that he plans on shaving himself back into a little boy body, which is what he wishes he had.  No pubic hair, no underarm hair, and while he's at it, let's get rid of all that pesky leg hair too!  For a second, I wonder - could this be gender-confusion?  After all, the poor kid has 3 sisters, and the house is full of every type of grooming aid, razor, cream, lotion, conditioner, and make-up galore!  But in my heart of hearts, I know that my big son just wants to be left alone to be a little boy.  OK, well, that's one positive, because his father would have a coronary if he ever found JohnPaul in a dress or tutu, or even just a pair of demure panty-hose.  Nope, we won't have that problem.  He's just a little boy, coping with living in a big-boy-and-growing bigger body. 

He'll get that razor for Christmas, by golly.  It'll come with Max, one of the new Thomas Trains.

Merry Christmas, JohnPaul.